What’s Twelve Inches Between Friends?

Posted in I dare you to look at the picture and tell me that size, penis diaries Tuesday December 4, 2007

This post was inspired by something Angie wrote in one of her Editing Tip Of The Day posts:

“Oh, and along the same line, she wouldn’t be able to give the exact length of his naughty parts either. Just saying”.

God, yes.

It really does take me out of the story when I know exactly how big the hero’s dick is supposed to be. It also makes me wonder when authors give their heroes ten-inch dicks, (and I’m talking on the soft here) whether or not they actually know what a ten-inch fatty would look (and probably feel) like. And don’t talk to me about those same ten-inchers also going up virgin bum holes. I’m squeezing my arse in sympathy at the very thought. *Shudder*

Can I just say, when you google the male penis, there are some fascinating bits of information out there. This site gave the average penis size, based on ethnicity (from a study that they’d done themselves presumably):


Average approximate penis size based on ethnicity (age 16 and over):

African/black: 6.74″
Native American: 6.49″
Middle Eastern: 6.28″
European/white: 6.26″
Hispanic: 6.03″
Asian/Pacific Islander: 5.50″

I wonder who got the job of doing the measuring?

This was also another fascinating bit of information:


“How would you describe the color of the hair on your head? (If it has grayed or fallen out, answer based on the hair you had when you were younger.)

Black: 18.3% (average penis length: 5.92″)
Dark brown: 47.7% (average penis length: 6.15″)
Light brown/dirty blond: 25.1% (average penis length: 6.20″)
Blond: 6.3% (average penis length: 6.24″)
Red: 2.6% (average penis length: 6.09″)

Guys with blond hair, on average, have the largest penises. As hair color darkens, average penis size goes down; those with black hair have the smallest average penises. Guys with red hair (whom some believe have the largest penises) are actually below average in size, coming in second to last in this breakdown. Understand, though, that this is only an average correlation; many blond-haired guys reported having small penises, and many dark-haired guys reported having large ones.”

Doesn’t this contradict the ethnicity stats slightly? How many blonde haired black/native American dudes do you see roaming the streets these days?

I also looked on Askmen.com, and found that their stats varied a little from those above, but never mind that, read this:

“THE LONG AND THE SHORT: According to the Kinsey Institute, the biggest erect penis on record measures 13 inches. The smallest tops off at 1 and 3/4 inches”.

1 and 3/4 inches? Shit, I wonder who drew the short straw there then? I bet he never goes into many communal bathrooms. Poor thing (over 18s only folks).

Anyway, what was my original point again?

Oh that’s it, the heroine knowing exactly how long her hero’s cock is, is daft. Unless she’s actually taken a ruler to it of course, but I would have thought that would be a bit of a passion killer. Especially if the man was lacking in both length and girth.

Just sayin.

22 Comments »

22 piped up to “What’s Twelve Inches Between Friends?”

  1. AvatarDecember/Stacia
    Posted: Dec 4th, 2007 at 2:28 pm
    1

    Yay! I get to be the first one to make the “blonds have more fun” joke!

    I’ve never written an inches measurement regarding penises. “Sizeable”, “wide”, etc…”gorgeous” or “beautiful”…and I recently had occasion to use Mrs. Patrick Campbell’s “Six foot four and everything in proportion” (although 6′4 is an estimate)…but I shy away from measuring in inches. Feels too Trey MacDougal to me.
  2. AvatarKatrina Strauss
    Posted: Dec 4th, 2007 at 3:58 pm
    2

    I generally stick with the description that, to the party about to “receive”, the throbbing staff of manly manhood looks sizable or impressive or something along those lines. My readers can make of that what they will, based on their own idea of “sizable” or “impressive”. I won’t go into TMI here but having perhaps broken out the ruler a few times in my life, an erect penis is not as long as it looks. Okay maybe that was TMI…
  3. AvatarDee Tenorio
    Posted: Dec 4th, 2007 at 4:30 pm
    3

    How many blonde haired black/native American dudes do you see roaming the streets these days?

    MWAHAHAHAHHAAHHAA! I just laughed so hard I spit on my baby. Oh man!
  4. AvatarAnonymous
    Posted: Dec 4th, 2007 at 5:01 pm
    4

    Bwahahahahahahahahahaha

    The pic for this blog post is sooooooooo wrong, it’s gotta be right!

    Bwahahaahahahahahaha!!!
  5. Avatarkirsten saell
    Posted: Dec 4th, 2007 at 5:32 pm
    5

    What’s really weird about penises is that they exist in a near-constant state of muscular contraction. It’s only when the muscles relax that blood is allowed to flood in and fill the spongey tissues inside. No point marveling over a man’s size when he’s flaccid–the biggest ones when soft usually have the smallest difference between turgid and non-turgid lengths. Those really bitty softies, though, are more indicative of a stronger muscular contraction than actual appendage length. Some of them can get pretty darn big when the pressure’s on. Especially if the guy’s just been in the pool or something.

    Further proof that men really are aliens.

    To paraphrase Elaine Benes, I don’t know how they walk around with those things.
  6. AvatarEve Vaughn
    Posted: Dec 4th, 2007 at 9:40 pm
    6

    LOL, Angie and a bunch of us were just having this discussion about penis size recently. I know I’m guilty of using the big cock device in some of my stories, becuase frankly, it’s all fantasy. But in reality if I saw something as big as a foot coming my way, I’d probably throw a rock at it. And honestly anything over a certain length can cause damage to your internal organs.

    On a side note. My hubby is blond *bg*
  7. AvatarJennifer McKenzie
    Posted: Dec 5th, 2007 at 1:33 am
    7

    Well, once I dated a guy who TOOK A PICTURE of his erect penis WITH A RULER so I’d know exactly what nine inches looked like.
    Just so you know (cause I’m so sure you do) nine inches was too much for me.
    And I don’t write about nine inch dicks. “Big” doesn’t necessarily mean “better”.
  8. AvatarAngelia Sparrow
    Posted: Dec 5th, 2007 at 2:01 am
    8

    You’d be surprised. We get a lot of blonde/blue or green-eyed black people in my area.

    A black man with blue eyes is very sexy.

    I digress.
    Size…A lot of writers seem to have a need to quantify it: 8 inch cocks, enormous C cup breasts (I have seen that), semen measured to the milliliter.

    I try to make my characters average, except when there is reason not to.

    Don’t tell me the character is thirteen inches and four thick. I’m going to go “Okay, he’s vain enough to take a ruler to it.”

    Show me someone’s reaction to that monstrosity:
    Nick wasn’t sure he’d be able to get [David's] whole cock in his mouth even soft. Members like asses and issue like horses, whispered an unbidden voice in his mind, and you will long for the lustful Egyptians of your youth.

    (and BTW, David is blond and short)
  9. AvatarCandice Gilmer
    Posted: Dec 5th, 2007 at 3:01 am
    9

    Okay, after almost spitting my drink on the computer monitor when I read this, I leaned over and hugged my lovely blond husband as I read him the results.

    He just grinned. :)

    But as far as the whole actual number thing in a story? That pulls me out of any story, and my first thought is “What’d she do, grab the darn ruler?”

    I actually read an erotic story not too long ago where the author said something about the penis being 12 inches, and I put the book down, refusing to read another word.
  10. AvatarRosie
    Posted: Dec 5th, 2007 at 3:37 am
    10

    This post assures me that you are never too old to learn something new. Thanks Karen!

    To be honest it depends on how much I’m bludgeoned with the penis size does it bother me. I’ve put a book down for a lot of reasons, laughed and shaken my head, but never solely because of mentioning size.
  11. AvatarAnn Bruce
    Posted: Dec 5th, 2007 at 6:10 am
    11

    semen measured to the milliliter

    Eewww! I guess my reading materials are pretty tame, after all.

    And 13″ is 7″ too long.
  12. AvatarJenyfer Matthews
    Posted: Dec 5th, 2007 at 6:51 am
    12

    “Big” doesn’t necessarily mean “better”.

    Tell that to the spam-gods who are constantly trying to sell me enlargement products so my “girlfriend won’t laugh at me”

    Eve – “But in reality if I saw something as big as a foot coming my way, I’d probably throw a rock at it.”

    BWHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!

    I don’t write about size in my books – another detail I prefer to leave to the reader’s imagination. If he’s a romance hero, let’s just assume that he’s well equipped enough to do the job well. So far I haven’t created a character where knowing his length and girth was going to add anything to his character analysis or the overall plot.
  13. AvatarAnne
    Posted: Dec 5th, 2007 at 1:47 pm
    13

    First of all, that picture is just disgusting. Talk about making me want to vomit. Jeez, Karen. LOL

    When I read about men with said largeness in books I always wonder how the hell that can feel good. I mean, wield a love wand (snort) that big at me and I’d be crossing my legs. Snicker. And then when some say, “You can take it all, take all of me,” I’d be like, oh, hell no! Hee!
  14. AvatarErin
    Posted: Dec 5th, 2007 at 2:27 pm
    14

    lol I agree, they’re almost always huge aren’t they? :)

  15. AvatarYou don't wanna know
    Posted: Dec 5th, 2007 at 4:28 pm
    15

    I wouldn’t touch that question with a ten inch pole.

    heheheh
  16. AvatarRocio
    Posted: Dec 5th, 2007 at 5:55 pm
    16

    The question really is:
    do women fantize about how BIg it is?
    Is the length of it part of our fantasies?
  17. AvatarMERLIN
    Posted: Dec 5th, 2007 at 10:03 pm
    17

    Apologies Ladies : Brief Intrusion

    Ah…. I think I fell in love with Sam Allardyce tonight.

    And I do believe I can smell blood (at last).

    Incidentally I have blond hair and a very big cock (It’s been remarked on several times).

    So there.

    Hugs,

    M.
  18. AvatarDecember/Stacia
    Posted: Dec 6th, 2007 at 12:03 am
    18

    Angelia Sparrow:

    Towhead McGee inserted all twelve inches of his manhood into the soft, deep crevasse between her mountainous D-cup breasts. The five inch girth fit perfectly into the fleshy space while her two-inch diameter nipples jutted porudly into the air, and he moved faster and faster until, with a cry, he covered her with 6 cc of thick, milky love.

    (Disclaimer: that prose is deliberately bad.)
  19. AvatarChris
    Posted: Dec 6th, 2007 at 10:09 am
    19

    Hi, I can’t find any contacts on your blog. Can I ask you to send a note for me? My email is in profile.
    Thanks, Chris
  20. AvatarMERLIN
    Posted: Dec 6th, 2007 at 2:36 pm
    20

    Only 6cc ?

    Some of you will be old enough to remember the British band 10cc.

    Some of you will wonder where their name came from.

    It’s the average amount ejaculated.

    Just thought you’d like to know that !

    M.
  21. AvatarKaren Scott
    Posted: Dec 6th, 2007 at 6:52 pm
    21

    It’s the average amount ejaculated.

    Merlin is that true? If so, it’s very wrong, yes.
  22. AvatarCiar Cullen
    Posted: Dec 7th, 2007 at 7:19 pm
    22

    Maybe one of the reports was using the “new math.” God, I’m dating myself with that. Size does matter because really, really big is damned scary. (For the purposes of this scientific research, said penis was Black, as well as the fellow attached to it, and his hair was very dark brown/black). They should have done it by body type, because there’s some inverse proportional skinny dude/big thang thing going on. At least in my small lifetime sample.
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