Comments on: Dilemma Friday: Would You Date Him? Part II… http://karenknowsbest.com/2009/04/03/dilemma-friday-would-you-date-him-part-ii/ The book crazy blogger who has an opinion on everything, from Britney Spears to the global economy Sat, 13 Mar 2010 17:39:50 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9.2 hourly 1 By: Jen http://karenknowsbest.com/2009/04/03/dilemma-friday-would-you-date-him-part-ii/comment-page-1/#comment-33857 Jen Thu, 09 Apr 2009 21:32:34 +0000 http://karenknowsbest.com/?p=3193#comment-33857 No way. Nonny said it best. I'm not opposed to older woman/younger man relationships, but in that kind of close-as-family situation, I'd be more inclined to believe it was either a crush, or some other social thing the young man was trying to work through. There's probably something there that says he feels comfortable enough with you as a family friend to confess something that potentially awkward. So even though there'd be no dating or hanky-panky going on, I'd still apply Dan Savage's Campsite Rule and let him down gently and with respect. And possibly in private, swearing-unto-secrecy, giving my friend at least a heads-up over it if the situation merited it. I wouldn't ever consider it, yet somehow if the situation were the plot of a romance novel, I'd be interested to see how the author would sell it, and if the author would be able to pull it off or not. No way. Nonny said it best. I’m not opposed to older woman/younger man relationships, but in that kind of close-as-family situation, I’d be more inclined to believe it was either a crush, or some other social thing the young man was trying to work through. There’s probably something there that says he feels comfortable enough with you as a family friend to confess something that potentially awkward. So even though there’d be no dating or hanky-panky going on, I’d still apply Dan Savage’s Campsite Rule and let him down gently and with respect. And possibly in private, swearing-unto-secrecy, giving my friend at least a heads-up over it if the situation merited it.

I wouldn’t ever consider it, yet somehow if the situation were the plot of a romance novel, I’d be interested to see how the author would sell it, and if the author would be able to pull it off or not.

]]> By: Lorraine http://karenknowsbest.com/2009/04/03/dilemma-friday-would-you-date-him-part-ii/comment-page-1/#comment-33801 Lorraine Thu, 09 Apr 2009 02:21:49 +0000 http://karenknowsbest.com/?p=3193#comment-33801 Hot young studs are a dime a dozen *at least in theory*, but a lifelong best friend only comes around once. I'd never risk her friendship for a fling, and I'd never allow myself to think it could be anything more. Hot young studs are a dime a dozen *at least in theory*, but a lifelong best friend only comes around once. I’d never risk her friendship for a fling, and I’d never allow myself to think it could be anything more.

]]> By: AztecLady http://karenknowsbest.com/2009/04/03/dilemma-friday-would-you-date-him-part-ii/comment-page-1/#comment-33724 AztecLady Tue, 07 Apr 2009 22:07:09 +0000 http://karenknowsbest.com/?p=3193#comment-33724 I have a son who's turning 21 in a few months, Karen--no way I can look at a kid barely four years older and get a sex vibe. Gah! I have a son who’s turning 21 in a few months, Karen–no way I can look at a kid barely four years older and get a sex vibe.

Gah!

]]> By: Karen Scott http://karenknowsbest.com/2009/04/03/dilemma-friday-would-you-date-him-part-ii/comment-page-1/#comment-33720 Karen Scott Tue, 07 Apr 2009 21:24:26 +0000 http://karenknowsbest.com/?p=3193#comment-33720 I note that the majority of you have said , no way, no how, but I personally think that if the above scenario actually happened, the percentage who <em>wouldn't</em> date him would reduce exponentially. I note that the majority of you have said , no way, no how, but I personally think that if the above scenario actually happened, the percentage who wouldn’t date him would reduce exponentially.

]]> By: Bhetti B http://karenknowsbest.com/2009/04/03/dilemma-friday-would-you-date-him-part-ii/comment-page-1/#comment-33621 Bhetti B Mon, 06 Apr 2009 18:34:00 +0000 http://karenknowsbest.com/?p=3193#comment-33621 Jane Austen's Emma pretty much had the same premise, though, but in reverse. Hmm, interesting, isn't it? Jane Austen’s Emma pretty much had the same premise, though, but in reverse. Hmm, interesting, isn’t it?

]]> By: JulieLeto http://karenknowsbest.com/2009/04/03/dilemma-friday-would-you-date-him-part-ii/comment-page-1/#comment-33549 JulieLeto Sun, 05 Apr 2009 01:39:39 +0000 http://karenknowsbest.com/?p=3193#comment-33549 No way. Women throw other women under the bus too often for men. The friendship should come first. And it's squicky, too. No way. Women throw other women under the bus too often for men. The friendship should come first. And it’s squicky, too.

]]> By: Christine McKay http://karenknowsbest.com/2009/04/03/dilemma-friday-would-you-date-him-part-ii/comment-page-1/#comment-33535 Christine McKay Sat, 04 Apr 2009 18:06:38 +0000 http://karenknowsbest.com/?p=3193#comment-33535 Definitely a no. And I wouldn't be able to give a thumbs up to a novel with this sort of plot either...although if he turned out to be a stalker and her rejection put him over the edge...yeah I could dig that sort of novel. Definitely a no. And I wouldn’t be able to give a thumbs up to a novel with this sort of plot either…although if he turned out to be a stalker and her rejection put him over the edge…yeah I could dig that sort of novel.

]]> By: Venus Vaughn http://karenknowsbest.com/2009/04/03/dilemma-friday-would-you-date-him-part-ii/comment-page-1/#comment-33519 Venus Vaughn Sat, 04 Apr 2009 10:13:44 +0000 http://karenknowsbest.com/?p=3193#comment-33519 I wanna buck the trend. I would date the dude. Yeah right. Umm, no. There's just too much ick to wade through. On the other hand, if in true romance fashion we were stranded on a desert island somewhere together and his folks had just died and we found ourselves bound together in a moment of intense, shared grief... still no. I wanna buck the trend.
I would date the dude.

Yeah right. Umm, no. There’s just too much ick to wade through.

On the other hand, if in true romance fashion we were stranded on a desert island somewhere together and his folks had just died and we found ourselves bound together in a moment of intense, shared grief… still no.

]]> By: Stacey http://karenknowsbest.com/2009/04/03/dilemma-friday-would-you-date-him-part-ii/comment-page-1/#comment-33513 Stacey Sat, 04 Apr 2009 03:05:59 +0000 http://karenknowsbest.com/?p=3193#comment-33513 No way....there is too much at stake (friendship) and just the thought of one of my friends dating my son makes me want to throw up. No way….there is too much at stake (friendship) and just the thought of one of my friends dating my son makes me want to throw up.

]]> By: KristieJ http://karenknowsbest.com/2009/04/03/dilemma-friday-would-you-date-him-part-ii/comment-page-1/#comment-33511 KristieJ Sat, 04 Apr 2009 02:45:30 +0000 http://karenknowsbest.com/?p=3193#comment-33511 Nope - it's not the age thing though I think that would be a bit too much of a difference - it's the close friend - known him since he was a kid thing. Though I would be HIGHLY flattered it he thought I was hot :-) Interestingly - my 20 year old son is dating someone six years older than he is. He thought it would bother me - but it doesn't at all. But if she were 20 years older - I would have second thoughts about it :) Nope – it’s not the age thing though I think that would be a bit too much of a difference – it’s the close friend – known him since he was a kid thing. Though I would be HIGHLY flattered it he thought I was hot :-)

Interestingly – my 20 year old son is dating someone six years older than he is. He thought it would bother me – but it doesn’t at all. But if she were 20 years older – I would have second thoughts about it :)

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