For those of you new to the world of romance novel blogland, the Smart Bitches are a couple of very smart, very funny, ultra-snarky bloggers who have a passion for romance novels; a passion that does not, however, blind them to the genre’s shortcomings, such as the over use of clichés, tropes, the godawful cover art, the often apostrophe-ridden, wince-worthy titles.

The Smart Bitches (SBSarah, aka Sarah Wendell of New Jersey, and SBCandy, aka Candy Tan of Oregon) have been around for a few years, providing continuous entertainment with their cover snark and an endless education. Their discussions have covered all aspects of the romance genre-from the use of rape as a metaphor for seduction to the evolution of the heroes and heroines from the stereotypes of the 1980s to the more realistic people of the late 1990s, to the use of ferrets to root out and demolish-metaphorically speaking-plagiarists.

How these two intelligent and educated women got together to create their very popular website, Smart Bitches Who Love Trashy Books, is a different story entirely, but now, inevitably, they have collaborated on a book that has a bit of something for everyone who believes that romance novels should be treated no more, but certainly no less, respectfully than other genres. After all, romance novels account for a hefty percentage of all book sales worldwide-in fact, the biggest slice of the publishing pie for any single genre.

A warning to those readers who may be easily offended by “strong language” (e.g., the “f” word, the “c” word, the “p” word, the “s” word, the “mf” word and, probably, the “x”, “y” and “z” words, too): you may want to consider waiting for the expurgated version.

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Warning, this is a particularly long rant, the likes of which I rarely like to indulge in these days, so I suggest you grab yourself some coffee and chocolates before you commence reading.

Dear Diane

I read your post the other day on E-span, (in response to Deidre Knight’s post that she wrote a few weeks ago) trying to defend RWA’s stance on e-publishing, and I must say, I was swearing rather loudly by the time I finished reading your column. I had to immediately take some maximum strength headache tablets, due to the brick-sized foot that seemed to be stamping on my head.

Diane, I get it, I really do, the RWA is a dinosaur that’s hard to move, mired in tradition such as it is. The majority of your members are print-published, so to a certain extent, I do indeed understand your reluctance to embrace anything that on the surface seems to veer away from those very traditions that are an essential part of your history and success.

However Diane, dinosaurs eventually became extinct, and there’s nothing to say that RWA in its current format, will continue to be successful. Myopia has downed many great organisations in the past, and RWA doesn’t have the divine right to be the exception to the rule.

Your stance with regards to digital publishing has turned this into a Them vs Us debate. Print vs E-published, as if the two aren’t able to co-exist happily together, without the constant attempts to undermine and bully the new kid on the block.

You wrote in your column: (more…)

Premeditated Murder, by Ed Gaffney

A courtroom drama, Premeditated Murder was Mr Gaffney’s debut novel. To date, he only has four books out (and was nominated for the 2009 Edgar Award for Best Paperback Original for his fourth book, Enemy Combatant). This book introduces to the readers two wonderful characters, lawyers Zack Wilson and Terry Tallach.

Here is the back cover blurb:

In a courtroom, everyone is entitled to the best defense. But in this trial, it will have to be the best defense… ever.

In a New England courtroom, two young defense lawyers face a trial they cannot win. For attorneys Zack Wilson and Terry Tallach, partners and best friends, it seems an open and shut case. Their client confessed to a horrific multiple homicide-and Zack and Terry have only one hope: to spare him from the death penalty. But even that is a long shot… until the case takes a sudden, strange turn.

The two lawyers may have stumbled on a loophole: their client had a secret motive for his indefensible act-a motive that might even free him if Zach and Terry can pull off an ingenious defense.

But as the media descend on a quiet Massachusetts town, and as Zack and Terry fight to save their client’s life, a surprise witness turns the trial into something no one could have predicted. Because only he can pull all the pieces of an astounding puzzle together-and expose a conspiracy that is more shocking, far-reaching, and treacherous than anyone could guess…

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“A major strand of our cultural DNA has left us. RIP MJ.”

John Mayer

It truly feels like the day that music died.

I can’t even comprehend my feelings of devastation. I feel like a family member died tonight, and I’m in mourning. A deep kind of mourning that is usually only reserved for loved ones.

Rest in peace Michael. My siblings and I will miss you terribly.

A Bravo’s Honor, by Christine Rimmer

Part of the long running Bravo series, this is my second exposure to Ms Rimmer’s work. Just a few weeks ago I reviewed the previous title, The Bravo Bachelor, here. A western-flavored retelling of Romeo and Juliet (with the requisite romance genre happy ending), A Bravo’s Honor tells the story of Luke Bravo and Mercedes (Mercy) Cabrera.

He is the third son of Davis Bravo, the wealthy financier and patriarch of this particular branch of the large Bravo family. She is the adoptive daughter of Javier Cabrera. Both families have been sworn enemies for some sixty years, and while there haven’t been any duels recently, there seems to be plenty of bad blood-cause enough to avoid stirring the pot, so to speak.

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You guys probably cannot tell, reading the bulk of my reviews, but I do read stuff other than romances.

Case in point:

Unnatural Death, by Dorothy L. Sayers

Oh man, my love for Ms Sayers’ characters is probably unhealthy, it is so vast, so deep, so strong! Unnatural Death is the third of Ms Sayers’ novels starring Lord Peter Wimsey, and the one in which the inimitable Miss Climpson is introduced.

The back cover blurb in my copy does the story absolutely no justice:

The wealthy old woman was dead-a trifle sooner than expected. The intricate trail of horror and senseless murder led from a beautiful Hampshire village to a fashionable London flat and a deliberate test of amour-staged by the debonair sleuth Lord Peter Wimsey.

Okay, now forget that awful paragraph; it has nothing to do with the novel.

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‘It’s like having a child that never grows up – how perfect is that?’ … Mary Lynn Campbell and Silly Willy, in My Monkey Baby. Photograph: Channel 4

I don’t agree with the act of dressing dogs in cutesy doggy clothes, as if they were a fashion accessory. In fact I hate it, and I truly believe it’s an act of cruelty towards the dogs, so you can imagine my horror when I watched this programme on the telly the other night.

It’s a new form of family life, and thousands of Americans are raising a monkey as a member of their family.

These cheeky monkeys have everything a real child could want, expensive clothes and toys. Their own rooms complete with TVs. Sweets, treats, and most of all, quality time with ‘Mum’ and ‘Dad’ In fact, all the love and attention a parent can give.

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Like many readers who spend time around romance blogs (readers’ or authors’) I have been an interested observer of the continuing train wreck that is RWA’s stance on e publishers.

Leaving aside the often condescending (if not outright distasteful) attitude that seem to drip off some of RWA’s board members’ communications with the general membership *coughDianePershingcough* here is some of the stuff I don’t get. If I understand correctly, the raison d’être for RWA is to educate its members, giving them the information they need to make intelligent choices about everything from choosing an agent to reading a contract, in order to have fulfilling careers as writers of romance novels.

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I mean really?

I wouldn’t mind, but the hat clearly doesn’t go with the dress.

Tall Dark Defender, by Beth Cornelison

This Silhouette Romantic Suspense title is my first exposure to Ms Cornelison’s work (though I know there’s at least another one in my TBR mountain range…). Tall Dark Defender tells the story of Annie Compton, a single mother of two young children and a survivor of terrific domestic abuse, and Jonah Deveraux, an ex-cop with his own emotional scars. This is also a sequel of sorts to Duty to Protect, in which Annie is a secondary character.

Here is the (misleading as usual) back cover blurb:

Rescued by a handsome stranger.

Undercover investigator Jonah Deveraux barely knew Annie Compton, but that didn’t stop him from nearly blowing his cover to save the pretty waitress from a ruthless killer. Convincing the stubborn single mom that she needed his protection 24/7 was a fiery battle of wills, but fighting his burning desire to make love to her was a war he wasn’t sure he could-or wanted to-win.

Annie didn’t like a mysterious man keeping watch over her, especially one as dangerously attractive as Jonah. But she’d do anything to keep her family alive, even if it meant giving in to her temporary bodyguard’s demands regarding her safety… and her heart.

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