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New game: find the logic

A newly married woman in her late thirties says, “Now he can’t leave me.”

A woman in her fifties about a coworker who’s looking for a second job, “I thought she married him so that he would support her.”

A woman in her twenties complains that she’s not making enough money. She gets a promotion–far more responsibility, $0.25 cents more per hour (that’s about forty more dollars a month, before taxes). Next thing she does? Get a new car–new as in this year‘s model, directly from the German cars dealership.

From a group of women in their mid-thirties, over lunch, “… and I finally realized that all the awful things that were happening to me were the result of my lack of obedience.”

A woman serving herself coffee on a cup from the competitor next door, “You are out of decaf, are you bringing more out soon?”

A group of women has been sitting at a table for about four hours. One of them gets up and asks, “At what time do you close?” “We closed ten minutes ago, ma’am.” “Oh. So we can still order, right?”

Reading the menu while placing an order for lunch, “Oh man, I didn’t know that had so many calories! Well, give me the (lower calorie count alternative) instead. Can I have an extra piece of bread with that?”

A woman in her early forties, “I just don’t understand how is it that he can’t see just how perfect I am for him!”

A woman in her late thirties takes a job serving drinks at a strip bar. She’s been told that she can make up to $300 a night. She explains how she had to go get new underwear because the ‘uniform’ consists of a black corset/cincher and really short black shorts. After the first night on the job she quits, shocked  that some of the customers grabbed her ass.

A woman in her mid-thirties, “Could you look in the trash for me? I can’t find my cell phone.”

(All these have been overheard by yours truly, by the way)