Posted in: crazy talk by crazy people, Fucktard of the week, Is It Cuz I Is a Woman?, Women on women hate
Tags:Daily Mail, On Beauty, Samantha Brick
On a recent flight to New York, I was delighted when a stewardess came over and gave me a bottle of champagne.
‘This is from the captain — he wants to welcome you on board and hopes you have a great flight today,’ she explained.
You’re probably thinking ‘what a lovely surprise’. But while it was lovely, it wasn’t a surprise. At least, not for me.
Throughout my adult life, I’ve regularly had bottles of bubbly or wine sent to my restaurant table by men I don’t know. Once, a well-dressed chap bought my train ticket when I was standing behind him in the queue, while there was another occasion when a charming gentleman paid my fare as I stepped out of a cab in Paris.
Another time, as I was walking through London’s Portobello Road market, I was tapped on the shoulder and presented with a beautiful bunch of flowers. Even bar tenders frequently shoo my credit card away when I try to settle my bill.
And whenever I’ve asked what I’ve done to deserve such treatment, the donors of these gifts have always said the same thing: my pleasing appearance and pretty smile made their day.
I think all of the above claims are fine actually, (if true, she writes for the Daily Mail after all) she’s a moderately good-looking woman, with a decent figure and blonde hair, men probably do like looking at her.
I think the issue for many people started at this point:
While I’m no Elle Macpherson, I’m tall, slim, blonde and, so I’m often told, a good-looking woman. I know how lucky I am. But there are downsides to being pretty — the main one being that other women hate me for no other reason than my lovely looks.
You see to me, I don’t think she’s wrong, women do often hate other women for no other reason than perhaps they’re prettier than them. The problem she has is that beauty is in the eye of the beholder, and when you boldly make claims about how beautiful you are, you probably need to have the goods to back it up with.
Frankly, because of her claim of being undeniably beautiful and pretty of face, I and others have been forced to look at her with a far more critical eye, than we probably would have under normal circumstances. Unfortunately for her, when we examine her photographs and compare them with her assertions, she comes off as being a tad delusional.
It seems to me that the women who are universally considered to be beautiful are the likes of Beyonce Knowles, Jennifer Lopez, Sophia Loren (in her heyday) Charlize Theron, Penelope Cruz, Michelle Williams (the white one), Carrie Underwood (I don’t have to like her music to acknowledge her natural beauty), Tyra Banks, (yeah, yeah, I know she was a model, but men love her shape and face), and Kristin Kreuk. Objectively speaking, if I was to see Samantha Brick on the street, she wouldn’t register, because to me, she is moderately attractive at best, nothing special, and not that visually appealing (but then I’m not a bloke).
The fact is though, I understand the broader point that Samantha is making. It seems to me that she’s talking about women-on-women hate. She’s worded it badly, used crap examples and extolled herself as a raving beauty, when in reality, she isn’t (in my opinion of course). And we as a people tend to like a show of humility in others anyway, so her boasting and hyperbolic narcissism was never going to go down well with the masses. (Which begs the question, is this what she’s like in real life, in which case, that might be one of the reasons she’s getting hate from other women.)
I’ve often discussed here at KKB about the sheer lack of sisterhood there is out there. You see it in shows like America’s Next Top Model, Big Brother, American Idol, and X-factor. You go on celebrity forums and the people who are most harshly judged and critiqued are the female celebs. Even fictional females are mocked and lambasted at a much greater rate than their male counterparts. Look at Bella Swan, for instance (yay, topical!), the fans of the Twilight franchise go mad for a blood-sucking, angsty vampire, yet slag off the fairly normal, if a little moody human girl. And I wont even go into the way Kristen Stewart herself is constantly criticised by other women.
I’m sure that it hasn’t passed anybody’s notice that on all the talent shows, it’s usually the girls who get voted out first, regardless of talent sometimes. Why is this?
This year on the UK version of Xfactor, a big deal was made of the fact that Little Mix, an all-girl band won the show for the first time in the programme’s history. This is because all-girl bands usually get voted out within the first two weeks of the show. The reason they won in my opinion, was because their mentor urged for girls to pick up the phone and vote for them, a call to arms, if you like.
Samantha Brick may have been a little misguided in her approach (OK, she probably just wanted some free publicity, hence the shock-jock tactics), but she is right in a broad sense. Some women do automatically dislike other women for no good reason, and see them as competition, rather than embracing them. I’ve been lamenting this fact for years. Samantha Brick may not be all that it says on the tin, looks-wise but for me, that’s quite besides the point. Whether or not I think she’s pretty is neither here nor there, because ultimately, I think she’s right.
What do you guys think? Is she a narcissistic, attention seeking twat who needs a good slap, or does she have a point?
Incidentally, which famous women do you consider to be beautiful? (Hey, I never said I wasn’t shallow!)
UPDATED TO ADD:
Samantha Brick has responded to yesterday’s backlash. According to her, she’s been proven right because of all the hate she’s been getting. Apparently even her close friends have been slagging her off behind her back on Facebook.
I’ve had malicious mail from everyone from Swedish crime writers to bored housewives asking me what planet I’m on for daring to write such a feature. This was all from strangers. But far worse came from those I had considered friends. When I logged on to Facebook, I found a group of them had torn me to shreds. Some were asking: ‘What the hell does Sam think she’s on?’ Others I haven’t seen since college had crawled out of the woodwork to criticise me for ‘always being like that’ — and even for having a ‘girly voice’.
While I’ve been shocked and hurt by the global condemnation, I have just this to say: my detractors have simply proved my point. Their level of anger only underlines that no one in this world is more reviled than a pretty woman.
Samantha, if even your close friends, and the people who know you best aren’t being supportive, may I suggest that either they were never really your friends or the problem might lie with you? Just a thought…