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As my regular readers know, I’ve been glomming JD Robb’s In Death books like a demon. At the moment I’m reading Witness In Death, and as I got to a scene where Roarke and Eve were doing the dirty, I had an epiphany.

It occurred to me, that I can probably recognise my favourite authors by their sex scenes alone.

For those of you who read the In Death books, you’ll know that Eve and Roarke’s sex scenes usually begin the same way. Roarke has a thing about her ta-ta’s, and they’re usually what he goes for first, then they eventually end up in his mouth. Tell me I’m wrong.

Erotic romance author, Lora Leigh, has a thing about back and crack sex. I haven’t read a single one of her books that didn’t include anal action. It has to be said though that she does them well, but it sure makes you wonder if she likes a lot of backdoor action herself. What? You know you’ve always wondered the same thing yourself secretly. Don’t deny it.

Shannon McKenna’s heroes have a habit of referring to the heroine’s breasticles, as ‘soft tits’. I don’t mind that she does this in the least, but it does get quite repetitive.

Catherine Anderson and Linda Howard also have trade mark sex scenes. You usually know exactly how their love scene will begin and end. I must admit, I tend to skip Linda Howard’s sex scenes just because they are actually quite predictable. Now that’s not me dissing her, cuz as you know, I think she’s the Vicar’s Knickers, but if you read her books, then I think you’ll know exactly what I mean.

Jaid Black’s male leads have a habit of referring to their man parts as if they were an actual person. It sometimes pulls me out of the story when the hero tells the heroine to touch ‘him’, but shit it’s Jaid, and I love her books, so she can do what the hell she likes.

There’s another EC author who has a habit of including at least one shaving scene during sex, in each of her books. I often wonder if this is because it’s something she’s into herself, or if she’s just using her imagination. Personally, I think she’s into it. It kinda screams fetish to me, but hey, to each her own. What? If you’ve read her, you know what I’m saying is true. End of.

This does however beg the question, do authors who write sexy books, write sex the way they like it personally, or do they rely purely on their imagination?