I really should be sorting through invoices, receipts and bank statements for our accountant to do what we pay him to do, but I just can’t be arsed, so I’m finding ways to procrastinate instead.

I did some gardening earlier, I finally got round to trimming our overgrown hedge at the front of the house. I got stung a few times by some alien plants, and a couple of spiders decided to nest in my hair, but apart from that, I got it done without any fuss. The Tall Guy was busy putting down new flagstones at the back of the house.

I also managed to find time to watch-but-not-really, Danielle Steel’s Family Album. I used to inhale her books (yes I did, and I’m not ashamed to admit it) but I guess I outgrew her, or something. My fave DS book ever was Zoya.

I’m rather hot on books set during Imperial Russia, which is why I’ve always been fascinated by the story of The Grand Duchess Anastasia, who may or may not have been mudered by the Bolsheviks. Give me a Tzar Nicholas over a Lord Bumstead-Higginbottom anyday.

How about you guys? Any of you admit to reading Danielle Steel books? Confession is good for the soul, so spill your guts wenches!

Anyway, moving swiftly on, I was at Cerridwen Press earlier, and I went to check out Emjai Colbert’s author page, to see if she’d released anymore books. She hadn’t, so I tried the link to her website. Her website no longer exists. Can anybody shed any light on what she’s doing now? I certainly hope she didn’t let my less than complimentary review stop her from continuing with her career, after all she got a five star review from those Harriet Klausners gals at Cupids Library🙂 I’m kidding of course, I do remember seeing a bad review there in March 05.

Anyway, if anybody knows what’s happened to her, let me know wont you? Thanks in advance.

Is anybody else trying to forget that Lisa Valdez’s Patience was due out in August, or am I the only one? *Sniff*

Oh, By the way, the RITA winners are out, here they are in all their glory courtesy of rwanational.org: (Erm, they list the authors who finalled then tell ya who’s won)

Best First Book
Show Her The Money
by Stephanie Feagan
(0373513542) Silhouette Books (Bombshell) – Natashya Wilson, editor

Best Contemporary Single Title
Lakeside Cottage
by Susan Wiggs
(0778321908) MIRA Books – Margaret Marbury and Dianne Moggy, editors

Best Inspirational Romance
Heavens To Betsy
by Beth Pattillo
(1-4000-7044-9) WaterBrook Press – Dudley Delffs, editor

Best Long Contemporary Romance
Worth Every Risk
by Dianna Love Snell
(0-373-27426-2) Silhouette Books (Intimate Moments) – Allison Lyons, editor

Best Long Historical Romance
The Devil to Pay
by Liz Carlyle
(0743470044) Pocket Books – Lauren McKenna, editor

Best Novella
“The Naked Truth about Guys” in The Naked Truth
by Alesia Holliday
(0-425-206149) Berkley Books – Cindy Hwang, editor

Best Paranormal Romance
Gabriel’s Ghost
by Linnea Sinclair
(0553587978) Bantam Books – Anne Groell, editor

Best Regency Romance
A Reputable Rake
by Diane Gaston
(0263843912) Harlequin Mills & Boon Limited – Linda Fildew, editor

Best Romantic Suspense
Survivor in Death
by J.D. Robb
(0-399-15208-3) Penguin Putnam – Leslie Gelbman, editor

Best Short Contemporary Romance
The Marriage Miracle
by Liz Fielding
(0263 842754) Harlequin Mills & Boon – Emma Dunford, editor

Best Short Historical Romance
The Texan’s Reward
by Jodi Thomas
(0-425-20584-3) Berkley Books – Christine Zika, editor

Novel with Strong Romantic Elements
Lady Luck’s Map of Vegas
by Barbara Samuel
(0-345-46912-7) Ballantine Books – Linda Morrow, editor

Best Traditional Romance
Princess of Convenience
by Marion Lennox
(0263848795) Harlequin Books – Sheila Hodgson, editor

So, how many of these little puppies have you guys read? I’ve read exactly one: Survivor In Death. The only other author that I’m remotely familiar with is Liz Carlyle. I haven’t heard of any of the other authors, no surprise there then, it was more or less the same last year. How many of these books have generated buzz? How is it possible I’ve managed to miss some of these*ahem* ‘gems’? Beats the hell outta me.

BTW, is it churlish of me to be happy that a past Authors Behaving Badly candidate didn’t win the RITA for Best Contemporary Singles Title? It is? Ahh fuck it, I guess I’m churlish as hell then. (g)

UPDATE – Oh incidentally, I heard from Brenda Coulter’s latest audio, that when Nora Roberts (who was the MC) accepted the award for Survivor, she said that JD Robb couldn’t make it, but that had she been there, she’d have thanked Nora Roberts for everything. I thought this was rather cute…

Hey, this will come in very useful when me and TTG are on our hols! How utterly fabulous!

Erm… incidentally, you have to have a blogger account before you can use audio blogger.

If you wanna know what’s going on at the RWA Nationals, this blog should help. It’s rather interesting.

The blogger visited a Jayne Anne Krentz and Susan Elizabeth Phillips seminar called ‘The Secrets of The Best-Selling Sisterhood’. Here’s my fave secret:

Secret Two: Ignore other people’s opinions.
One of my notes for this reads, I swear: some have ason losh byp lo set. (Make of that what you will.)

(Here she talked about not giving bad reviews any power. Especially since she and Jayne don’t think good or bad reviews affect your career that much.)

SEP: Bad reviews do nothing for your career.
JAK: Pipsquat.

SEP: When I get a bad review, I call Jayne who knows just what to do.
JAK: Because I get so many of them.

Incidentally, I’ve always imagined SEP to be much younger. She looks nothing like I thought she would.

BTW, this gal has a list of other RWA bloggers. Check out Brenda Coulter’s audio post. I liked that idea a lot.

Gosh is it that time of the year already? Here’s the blurb on Stella’s website:

Sharpen up your action skills to write a scene where hero and villain face off in a potentially deadly scene. The heroine may be present or not, included in the action, or not.
The Scarlet Boa contest is open to published and non-published authors alike. Submit your entry (approximately 500 words). We’ll accept submissions until September 1st and start posting links to them below.

So who’s going to judge this thing? You are! Scenes will be judged by readers—who knows better what makes them tingle?

The author of the winning scene will receive (apart from kudos, bragging rights and press coverage) the coveted Scarlet Boa, a gorgeous red feather boa that will simply scream “I write Romance!” (well, it will scream something). And since we can’t leave out the judges, one lucky voter’s name will be drawn at random and they’ll receive a sumptious white boa to wear while reading their new romance novels.

You can get further information on this year’s contest here.

Isn’t he just purrrrrrfect….. ?

It’s funny, but this little man stole my heart from the moment I held him. He’s the first addition to our family for over twenty years, and oh boy, was he a welcome addition…

Riverbend talks about the American soldiers who gang-raped an Iraqi girl, then burned her body to hide the evidence, and killed her five year old sister, and the parents.

I can’t imagine living with that shit on my doorstep. It was interesting reading her point of view.

I was in Borders earlier, and as I was trying my best to read an entire Susan Donavan book, so that I wouldn’t have to actually buy it, an elderly man, and his wife ambled into the romance section.

If I had to take a guess at their ages, I’d say that they were in their late eighties. He was quite doddery, as old men are apt to be, and she was in a wheelchair, and looked very frail indeed.

I couldn’t help but overhear their conversation. Apparently, she was looking for a romance book, so he basically pushed her to the G, section, and told her to call him when she’d chosen a book.

Now, I couldn’t help but glance over at this lady, because I couldn’t figure out how she was going to manage to look at any of the books in front of her, seeing as she was so far away from them.

Anyway I watched her out of the corner of my eye, for a further few minutes, but she didn’t actually move. I was in two minds whether to ask her if she was ok, or to leave her alone, but me, being me, had to ask her if she was ok.

She told me that she couldn’t reach the books, but that she wanted a good romance book, and because her eye-sight was failing, she desperately needed large print.

I asked her what kind of romance she liked, at which point I expected her to say Barbara Cartland and she just kinda looked at me, and said she didn’t mind as long as it was a good read.

I picked out Garwood’s The Lion’s Lady, but the print was much too small for her. At this point her hubby came doddering along with his walking stick, and cheerfully asked her if she’d managed to find anything. I looked at him and told him that she couldn’t see the books, nor could she reach them from her current position.

I escorted them both to the front of the shop, and asked one of the assistants if there were any large print romance books. He told me that unfortunately, there weren’t, so I asked if there were any romance audio books. Fortunately, for the woman in the wheelchair, there were a few romances, including Robert’s Blue Dahlia (of course), on tape.

I left the elderly couple in the capable hands of the assistant, but I have to say, that episode made me think.

I can’t imagine being unable to read books, because I couldn’t see the words.

Reading is such an integral part of my life, that I don’t know what I would do, if I had to rely solely on audio books. I do have a couple, but I much prefer letting words flow through my mind, using my own mental voice, rather than being reliant, on somebody else’s interpretation of the words, to guide me through.

So, in celebration of the beauty of reading, I’d like you guys to let me know which books you’re reading right now, and whether or not they’re worth recommending so far.

I’m currently reading Audrey Niffenegger’s The Time Traveller’s Wife, and so far it’s marvellous.

Here’s the blurb off the back of the book:

This is the extraordinary love story of Clare and Henry who met when Clare was six, and Henry was thirty six, and were married when Clare was twenty-two and Henry, thirty.

Impossible but true, because Henry suffers from a rare condition where his genetic clock periodically resets and he finds himself pulled suddenly into his past or future.

In the face of this force they can neither prevent, nor control, Clare and Henry’s struggle to lead normal lives is both intensely moving, and entirely unforgettable.

Now doesn’t that sound fab?

Now it’s your turn. you’re even allowed to mention Changeling Press books, as long as the covers don’t suck great big hairy donkey balls.

From AngieW’s blog…

Introducing….

THE REALITY CHICK BUZZ THE BOOK contest!

The PRIZES:

(1) Your choice of either an iPod Shuffle, OR a fifty dollar Amazon.com gift certificate
(2) An autographed copy of REALITY CHICK by Lauren Barnholdt
(3) A copy of the August issue of Teen People, which lists REALITY CHICK as a Can’t-Miss Pick for August
(4) Free tuition to a session of Lauren’s YA writing class

THE CONTEST:

STEP ONE: Simply copy and paste this whole message (including the info about the contest) into any blog, message board, email list, myspace bulletin, or anywhere a lot of people will see it!

REALITY CHICK by Lauren Barnholdt is NOW IN STORES!

Going away to college means total independence and freedom. Unless of
course your freshman year is taped and televised for all the world to
watch. On uncensored cable.

Sweet and normal Ally Cavanaugh is one of five freshpeople shacking up
on In the House, a reality show filmed on her college campus. (As if
school isn’t panic-inducing enough!) The cameras stalk her like
paparazzi, but they also capture the fun that is new friends, old
crushes, and learning to live on your own.

Sure, the camera adds ten pounds, but with the freshman fifteen a given anyway, who cares?
Ally’s got bigger issues — like how her long-distance bf can watch her
loopy late-night “episode” with a certain housemate…

Freshman year on film.
It’s outrageous.
It’s juicy.
And like all good reality TV, it’s impossible to turn off.

IN STORES NOW!

Check out Lauren on the web at www.laurenbarnholdt .com or on her myspace at www.myspace.com/laurenbarnholdt

STEP TWO — Email Lauren at lauren (at) laurenbarnholdt.com and let her know you’ve posted about the contest and the book, and you’ll be entered to win the prize pack! The winner will be picked at random on September 1st. The more places you post, the more entries you get. Have fun and good luck!!!

(Ok, this is my good deed for the day, and I’m not even sure who Lauren Barnholdt is, but it saves me from taxing my blogging brain too much, heheh!)

Jan W Butler for apparently writing the following in an edition of the Romance Writers Report, courtesy of Kate’s blog.

. . . romance isn’t about just any “two people” celebrating “love in its many forms.” Organizations such as the Man-Boy Love Association would certainly refer to themselves as celebrating love “two people” (or more) finding love in one of its many forms” . . . while they actively promote pedophilia.

Think RWA can’t go down that slipper slope? Think again. Under our present definition, we cannot exclude such “love stories” under the category of “romance”. We, as a culture, seem to have forgotten how to say “enough is enough,” but RWA can–indeed, must–do better than that. . . .

And, please, spare us the arguments about “censorship” and “inclusiveness.” Preference for “one man, one woman” stories represents what RWA has always claimed is romance’s target demographic: college-educated, married, middle-class, monogamous, and moral. . . .Only in recent years has a vocal (translate: shrill) minority tried to drive RWA’s focus off that path, under the guise of “broadening its horizons.” But refusing to define romance according to the parameters it has held for centuries doesn’t “broaden” anything . . . it only starts us down the aforementioned slope, and once we’re in that slide, heaven help us.

There’s an old saying, “Go home with the one who brought you here.” What brought romance fiction to its present level of success is a collection of decades’ worth of one-man, one-woman relationships stories, in all their richness, variety, and power. RWA should be the first to endorse that, rather than attempting to placate fringe groups trying to impose their standards upon the rest of us. If anyone’s in danger of being “censored” here, it’s believers in “what comes naturally”: one-man, one-woman romance. We in RWA owe it to ourselves not to let that happen. Jan W. Butler

Jesus. Fucking. Christ.

You know, I’d love to know what the Queen bees of romance think of articles like this. I wonder if they secretly agree, or if they’re disgusted by the absolute drivel that comes from the mouths of people who should know better.

BTW, I didn’t realise that the RWA only targets college-educated, married, middle-class, monogamous, and moral people? So unmarried women don’t read romance?

Check out this great post from Mrs Giggles. All I can say is, what she said.

And that’s all I’m saying about the latest blogland bust up.

I found this on an author blog, via a link from Sybil:

Calling all Authors!

Tired of being trashed with no recourse? There may be something we can do to minimize the effects of mindless reviews.

I am sending a cache of letters to Amazon’s corporate office requesting that all reviews be ordered according to their stars. Five stars at the top. One star on the bottom. The reader can choose which order she wishes to read the reviews in, but the best will always be at the top. This may cut down on the deliberate trashing of books because the trashers review wil always be at the bottom and not the first thing prospective buyers will see.

Please send your letters made out to Amazon requesting this change in how reviews are presented to:

*Address omitted*

Deadline for final mailing will be Aug. 31 St 2006 but depending on the response I may send several batches. Spread the word.

Hmmm… Aren’t you Americans big on freedom of speech etc, etc, etc?

What if the reviewer genuinely hated a book? Is it right that only the good reviews should be featured at the top? I know they aren’t talking about banning the crappy reviews, but isn’t this a type of censorship? Would it even work? Wouldn’t some people just choose to look at the negative reviews first anyway?

If a one star review is well written, without bashing the author, why should it be relegated to the bottom? What’s the point in having reviews on a site such as Amazon, if authors can pick and choose which reviews go where?

I don’t post reviews on Amazon, as a general rule, so it doesn’t really affect me, but doesn’t the whole idea make you feel a tad uncomfortable…?

So I read Undressing Mercy a couple of days ago, dontcha just love the cover? No? Well sod ya then!

Anyway, here’s the blurb:

Mercy Rothwell’s job is to entice the crème de la crème of the art world to The Holman art gallery, where she works as a director, and they don’t come much bigger than Shamus Montgomery, a sculptor, who’s renown for his erotic works.

Shamus agrees to sign with Holman, but only if Mercy is willing to bare all, and let him sculpt her whilst sitting on his face nekkid.

Knowing that this would be a massive coup for her, career-wise, Mercy, reluctantly agrees.

Mercy finds Shamus devastatingly attractive, and she is aware that the feeling is mutual, but ever since she was tragically betrayed by a work colleague, who she considered a friend, she has kept all men at a distance, although Shamus tempts her like no other.

Will Mercy be able to overcome her past, or will her future be forever tainted with memories of the dark night that changed her life?

My Verdict

I really liked this book, I really did.

I was initially drawn to Undressing Mercy because I liked the front cover, but when I read the blurb, it seemed just a tad too bland for me, but I persevered, and decided to have a quick flick through anyway. (Note to Ms Lee, the blurb needs work..)

I read the first couple of pages, and decided to purchase. (By the way, I paid a whopping great £8.99 ($15) which I thought was bloody expensive for a book that only has 182 pages. This is what I call a rip-off.)

My favourite thing about Undressing Mercy was the hero, Shamus Montgomery. He was lovely. I love me some darkly brooding, yet sensitive arty type men, who know how to use their penis properly treat a girl right.

I loved his intensity, and this is something that Ms Lee managed to convey very well. He wasn’t an arsehole, and at no point in the book did I feel the urge to take a meat cleaver to his very manly tackle. Can I hear a Hallelujah for that?

I loved the fact that Ms Lee also managed to make him sensitive, without turning him into My Gay Best Friend. I love sensitive men, but I certainly don’t want to be channeling Lizza Minnelli’s David Gest whilst reading a romance book, ya know what I mean?

Mercy was a slightly more complicated kettle of fish. I did like her, but I had to fight really hard to understand her reasoning for not pressing charges on the arsehole who raped her. She had all the evidence she needed, but instead she chose to leave her place of work, and so the perpetrator managed to get off scott free. Grrrrr. HOT BUTTON, HOT BUTTON, HOT BUTTON!

Now I know that this is often the case in real life, but Mercy was a very strong character, and it just seemed to me that somebody as mentally tough as she was, would have wanted to see justice done. In the book, her motivation for not pursuing the bastard who raped her, was because she didn’t want to be seen as a victim, which, I would have understood a bit better, had her life not been ruled by the actions of the colleague who’d assaulted her.

Now being a Borderline Feminist which basically means I like to wear perfume, and shave my under-arm hair choosing to not act against a man who raped you, is something that I find hard to understand, and never having been a victim of rape, I can only imagine that I’d want justice if it had happened to me.

Having said the above, I did like the heroine. Apart from the whole rape issue, she was a strong woman, who didn’t take shit from anyone. I especially liked the way she dealt with the obligatory arsehole in the book, who’s sole mission in life was to make her life a misery.

I loved the chemistry between Mercy and Shamus. The contrast between these two people, which had nothing whatsoever to do with colour, was one of the things that I especially liked about the book. I felt that Mercy was the more fiery, (if sometimes slightly insecure) character, whilst Shamus was her anchor, who was able to pull her back, when things got too rough. They felt like real people, and it was easy to relate to them.

Not to say that they could be my next door neighbour or anything, because I imagine that Mercy is nothing like Betty, the elderly lady, who lives next to us, with her noisy freakish Yorkshire Terrier dog…. Erm I digress…

Anyway, to sum up, I often compare reading a book to taking a cruise on the Mediterranean, sometimes, the waters are so rough, you want to puke your guts up, and the people who you meet are so fucking annoying, they make you want to eat your own children, but other times, the waters are lovely and smooth, with hardly a ripple to mar the coastline, and it’s a joy to share a margarita or two with your fellow cruisers.

Well this book was comparable to the latter. Deanna had a good voice, the book was easy to read, it had the right emotional elements when needed, flowed along at a nice pace, and didn’t make me want to punch the bookseller chick at Borders or demand my £8.99 back. What more can a reader ask for?

By the way, for those who don’t particularly enjoy page after page of gratuitous, mind-numbing sex scenes, *cough*Elizabeth Bevarly*cough, cough* I can assure you that this book is probably on par with your average Blaze, in terms of the sexual content. The words, cock, fuck, and clit were used on the odd occasion, but don’t worry, it was all very tastefully done. *g*

You can visit Deanna Lee here and buy Undressing Mercy here.

I’ve been tagged by Keishon, so here are my answers.

When did you start blogging and why?

I started blogging in April 2005. I’d mainly been on Yahoo groups, but I had too many controversial opinions to go posting them on author loops. The Stepford way of posting, that some groups encouraged was just not me. I wanted to slice and dice at will, and unfortunately, a lot of the authors were into that whole, ‘if you can’t say anything nice’ shit.

What don’t you talk about?

Ultra-personal things that may be happening in my life, everything else is pretty fair game.

Are you and your blogging persona the same person?

Pretty much, the main differences being that when I’m being irreverent or sarcastic, people in my real world get it, whereas, in the blogosphere, some people like to think that my sole purpose in life is to make their lives a misery. Seriously, that shit takes far too much energy.

How do you use blogging to build friendships?

Not really sure, I used to comment a lot more on various blogs, but these days I’m reluctant to put my thoughts on other people’s blog, unless I’m familiar with them, and like them.

On my own blog, I like reading other people’s opinions, so I post on a variety of subjects, and I refuse to pigeonhole myself in a way that means that my blog subjects are limited.

How would you describe your writing style?

Brilliant, at best, lazy, at worst. *g*

Seriously, it depends on my mood, sometimes erratic, other times introspective, sometimes controversial. but mostly tongue-in-cheek.

Also, I can’t be arsed remembering grammatical rules, and I have a habit of mixing up my metaphors. Mrs Mackay, my English teacher in high school would be so proud.

Tagging:

Bam
Anne
Shelly
Rosie
KatO+
Indida

I was driving along this morning and I saw a couple of nuns in full habit. My first thought was, poor bitches sweating in this heat, my second thought was, I wonder if they’re both really virgins, and my third thought was, I wonder if they masturbate…

Any nuns out there want to enlighten me?

What? What else am I supposed to think about when driving in this heat?

Dude, he made her wear a diaper, and she had to post it on her blog.

I found this author interview at the Book Bitches blog. The author is a lady called Jill Barnett.

One of the questions that she was asked was this:

Where do you see it going now that romance novels are delving into more erotic grounds or into the ‘chic lit genre’?

This was her rather interesting answer:

It had better go backwards soon. Back to good books and good stories, and books set somewhere other than Regency England.

These two facets that you’ve mentioned, chic lit and erotica, now attached wrongly to romance, and the dull uninspired limits placed on the historical romance genre by publishing houses, is the reason we have lost 75% of our readers.

Romance has always sold strongly before, so a new genre, attaching itself to romance, only helps the new genre.

Even for top sellers now inside the genre, the print runs are 70% less than they used to be. Readers buy an authors voice, her way of storytelling, not a type of book. There is little room for voice inside erotica, and erotica gets old fast.

Is it me, or does she seem to be blaming the loss of romance readers, on the introduction of erotica/erotic romance?

It can’t possibly be because of the constant regurgitation of the same old, same old cookie cutter stories, being churned out by both big name, and midlist authors? Nope, let’s just blame erotic books. That’s the ticket.

I wonder how many erotic romance books she’s actually read? More to the point I wonder if she’s lumping erotica in with erotic romance? That comment about little room for voice in erotic stories, struck me as being a little patronising and myopic. I think Emma Holly has an amazing voice, and she writes erotic fiction. Methinks she’s just insulted a whole lotta authors out there, and she doesn’t even know it.

Oh well, it’s not like she’s a lone voice here, we know there are lots of authors who feel the same way as she does.

I bet she’s Elizabeth Bevarly’s bestest friend. *g*

Helen Baxendale

Emily Breastfeeds Baby In Public

I saw Helen Baxendale (Emily from Friends) breastfeeding her baby this week. I had a meeting with a client at the hotel where she happened to be staying. We were sat in a main lounge area, so I looked at the passers by, to gauge their reactions, I’d say that most of them were more embarrassed than anything else. One of the employees of the hotel, walked past, and looked utterly horrified by the sight. Helen looked too harassed to give shit what anybody else thought.

Her baby was too cute for words, although it must be noted that she was wearing the most horrendous puke-green and white blouse, and her hair looked as if it would have benefited from a brush being run through it.

Carnival Fun

Some of my girlfriends and I went to our town’s annual carnival last week, it was heaps of fun, unfortunately, I only have about three pictures, because my battery decided to die, almost as soon as we got there. Godammit.

We ate lots, drank lots, danced lots, got our arses pinched by total strangers, and went back to our respective partners. My kinda day.

Keep-fit Karen

This week, I started my Bikini Body Countdown To Cali programme. It’s been a while since I went to the gym, and I can certainly tell, by the extra skin that’s found its way onto my hips. Anyway, no more crappy food, and I’ve started swimming again. I’m aiming to lose at least 12lbs. The last thing I want is to be harpooned by somebody mistaking me for a beached whale. Also, I know I’ll gain about 14lbs whilst over there, with all the crappy food that will be made available to us.

If I can be arsed, I’ll do a weekly report on my progress. If I can be arsed.

Holiday With The Girls

My sister and her best friends are going on holiday tomorrow. They’re going to Agia Napa for a week, that should be very messy. Girls on holiday together are often messed up affairs.

The last time I went on holiday with my girlfriends was a few years ago, when we went to Corfu. I produced a video diary of all our activities actually, and called it Corfu Uncovered.

It was all very messy. Lots of drinking, lots of flirting (not by me, I hasten to add) and lots of general bad behaviour (again, not me). Four of us travelled, and by the end of the hols, I was pretty pleased to get home. Girls on holiday together can be a nightmare, especially if one feels that she’s not getting the same amount of attention from the guys. One of the girls (T) had a face like a wet weekend all holiday. So much so, that I had to tell her that she was acting like a bitch (hey nobody elese dared, and she was my best friend after all) and that she ought to belt up.

She proceeded to ignore me and the others for the rest of the holiday. Sigh.

The funniest moment of the holiday was when we got on a bus, still drunk from the night before, and we were laughing that hard and that loudly, that the coach driver kept giving us the evil eye. It didn’t help that we were sat, right behind him. Anyway, I said something to S, just as she was taking a drink of water, and she laughed so hard, she spat the water onto the coach driver. Oops.

He stopped the coach (it was full by the way) and ordered us off the bus. I stood up, put on my best ‘don’t fuck with me’ voice, and told the bus driver that if he threw us off, we’d sue him and the bus company for abandoning us, and consequently endangering our lives, in a foreign country.

He got back on the bus and continued to drive to the water park. We sobered up around 2pm that afternoon. Oh happy days.

Superman Returns

Absolutely Bootiful Man…

In other news, The Tall Guy and I went to see Superman Returns last night.

After reading some of the American reviews that were less than complimentary, I was apprehensive about going to watch it, but as it happens, I FUCKING LOVED IT.

There was always going to be the obvious comparisons between Brandon Routh ( Bam, he’s so mine) and the late Christopher Reeve, but I’m happy to say that he wore the Superman suit, like it was made for him, (erm… you know what I mean) and man, that boy was hot. He’s joined Will Smith, and Christian Bale (Batman) in my Hot Man sandwich, and yes, I happen to be the filling.

What I loved about the film was actually how simple it was, and how it managed to stay true to the original Superman (I’m sorry, but I’m far too young to remember the black and white version).

I loved that Routh was able to make me forget that he hasn’t always played this role. BTW, Can I just say that everytime he came on screen as Clark Kent, I had the insane urge to get nekkid. Is that wrong?

Apparently most of America thought that Kate Bosworth was a crap Lois Lane, but fuck that, I thought she was just right, even if she could have done with eating a bit more food. Man, that female was thin.

Kevin Spacey was brilliant of course, as Lex Luthor, but the man’s a genius, so I wasn’t really surprised. Also, Parker Posey, who played Lex’s obligatory slutbag sidekick, was pretty good too.

When TTG and I discussed what our feelings on the film, afterwards, we agreed that for 2 plus hours, we’d both wished that such a man existed in this troubled world of ours. That feeling was compounded, when we got home, and switched BBC News 24 on, to find that the Israeli’s had just bombed some more Lebanese people.

I’d say the world definitely needs Superman. And I need to have Brandon Routh’s babies.

Paris Hilton’s New Record

I heard it the other day, and I have to say, I thought it was rather good. Yes, I liked it, regardless of how over-produced it probably was.
It was a feel-good summery record, and I bet she does really well in the British charts. At least she’s trying to earn her own money. Can’t fault her for that.

New Cell Phone

I got a new mobile phone this week, the Nokia 6280 with a 2 megapixel camera, a built in MP3 player, and 3G capability (whatever the hell that means). It’s very cute.

Well, that’s all for now, I managed to read both Deanna Lee’s book, and Judi McCoy’s book, and I’ll be reviewing them shortly.

You know, no matter how often I read the word ‘cunt’ in a book, it still manages to jar me, whenever I come across it. I’m in the middle of reading an Elloras Cave release, and it just popped out from nowhere, and took me right out of the story.

Whatever happened to the good old vagina eh? Even ‘snatch’ is preferable to cunt. *Shudder*.

Even Mrs Giggles has had to have her say on a certain Badly Behaved Author.

This shit’s gone wide and far huh? Sometimes it’s just best to give in gracefully, and avoid the shit.

I wonder if Deanna Lee knows that Amazon UK, has this book listed as Understanding Mercy, instead of Undressing Mercy.

What a mistaka-to-maka. Deanna, go tell them to pull their socks up for Oprah’s sake!

I quite like the cover. It doesn’t really tell a story, but I like the sepia coloured photography. It’s quite sensual, and readers are left in no doubt what kind of book they’re gonna get.

It’s a Kensington Aphrodisia erotic romance book.

To be honest, I’d not heard about this line, till recently, but I’ve already read one, and it wasn’t half bad. Shit I forget the name now.

Anyway, will review this once I’ve read it.

By the way, I bought a Judi McCoy book today, anybody read her? Is she any good? Should I even be asking seeing as I’ve bought the damn thing already?