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Beverly Havlir (EC author) is thinking of writing a May/December romance, with the heroine being older than the hero. The thing is, she’s not sure what constitutes an older woman, or what sort of age gap would work.

She asks:

Personally, I like younger man, older woman stories, but I’m not sure how well heroines in their forties are received in Romanceland. I’d say, make the woman 38, and the guy 28. I think ten years is enough of a gap.

What do you guys think? If you have an opinion on this, pop over to Bev’s blog and let her know what you think.

13 Comments »


  • Beverly Havlir
    October 8
    3:13 am

    Hey Karen,

    A 38 yeard old woman and a 28 year old man is very doable for me. Maybe because I’ll be 38 next year. LOLOL.
    Thanks for stopping by! Hugs!

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  • Rosie
    October 8
    8:08 am

    Too much of an age gap whether it is man/woman or woman/man doesn’t appeal much to me. I think the story has to work too hard to sell the age difference by saying and showing how it doesn’t matter.

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  • eggs
    October 8
    9:01 am

    I’ll be 38 next year too, and I could easily bang a 28 year old guy (if only Mr. Eggs would let me!). HOWEVER, last night Mr. E made the error of selecting one of those “sex education” videos on the adult channel. It was about “your sex life after 40”. It was a video of folks in their forties, fifties and sixties going down on each other, useing various power toys on each other, and just generally going at it hammer and tongs. I can tell you for a fact that the fantasy part of my brain is now just a charred wasteland when it comes to “sex after 40”!

    Mr. E. and I had a good laugh about it afterwards, about how that’s exactly the feeling folks in their teens and twenties get when they imagine us having sex. For that reason I think a 38 year old heroine would alienate a large part of the audience and, at the end of the day, the purpose of writing EC books is to sell them. I think 35 is about the cut off for the ick factor (yes, i know that means I’m already ick!). Beverly should watch that video first and then decide if she can make an erotic heroine in her 40’s a saleable fantasy character. FWIW, I plan on being like one of those old ladies in the video and enjoying my sex life well into old age, but that doesn’t mean I think it’s a good idea to scare the children by putting it out there as entertainment.

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  • Karen Scott
    October 8
    11:42 am

    Hi Beverly!

    Rosie, don’t you think though that if she’s gonna write a May to December relationship, there should be a significant enough gap to make it worthwhile?

    Eggs, that’s the funniest story I’ve heard in ages, I was literally in stitches! I can’t imagine doing a Paris in my forties either, lol!!

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  • Eve Vaughn
    October 8
    2:01 pm

    Bev you don’t look a day over 25.
    seriously.

    As for older woman younger man books, I think they would sell. I mean I can’t remember the last time I read a book where the man wasn’t at least five to fifteen years older than then woman, so why not the other way around. I’ve already told my husband if something ever happens to us, (god forbide) I’m getting a younger man. LOL. I love the older man younger books because they’re so rare and refreshing.

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  • Beverly Havlir
    October 8
    3:05 pm

    Thanks, Eve. *g*
    You’re right. Why not turn it around? We always read about older men, younger women. Something out of the norm would be refreshing. It’s certainly food for thought. Thanks Karen for throwing this out there!

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  • Rosie
    October 8
    3:54 pm

    Karen, I’m just saying that sure it happens in real life, yes there is even the occasional romance with a May/December guy and woman. However when it is the man who is younger the story is always about the age difference. That isn’t the case when the man is older. With the exception of a Suzanne Brockman (Admiral’s Bride) and a couple of old Diane Palmer’s books I don’t remember a younger woman/older man book discussing age, but when it’s the reverse the age difference is what the story is about.

    Personally, I don’t want to read that…and why should the story be about their age difference? Why should Beverly have to ask this question?

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  • Beverly Havlir
    October 8
    5:25 pm

    Hi Rosie,

    I think I may have been misunderstood. I never said the story will be about age difference. I was actually wrestling with the question of what age difference constitutes one big enough to be considered an older woman, younger man romance. And if readers will identify enough with a fortyish woman to buy the story (whatever the plot maybe).

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  • Lori
    October 9
    4:04 am

    I think the age difference is significant only if it makes a difference to the H/H. So if she’s 35 and he’s 25, it’s not a big deal, unless it’s a big deal to her.

    And hey, eggs,… as someone who just turned 40, people in their 40s have awesome sex!

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  • Rosie
    October 9
    4:00 pm

    Beverly, I didn’t think you were writing about the age difference, I’m saying that most (if not all) stories I’ve read where the woman is older whether in her 40s or 30s the conflict seems to be about age or the age difference.

    It isn’t that I have a problem reading about a woman in her 40s. I just don’t want the story to be about being in your 40s.

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  • sallahdog
    October 9
    5:42 pm

    For myself, I like romances that are about the personalities involved… I read almost any genre, sci fic, paranormal, contemporary, etc, but at the core the books I like end up being about the people…

    I guess what I am trying to say is that if the story was interesting and had a hook which was more than just age related, I would read it… I never like books that the hook is the external difference between the man and woman (race, attractiveness,cinderella fantasies)

    So yeah, I think it could work, but only if the couple didnt have a problem with the age gap… for me the hook would be more that others had a problem with it, while the couple wondered what the big deal was…. Lets face it, a 38 to 40 year old woman is not THAT different from a man in his late 20s and early 30s…

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  • Devonna
    October 9
    6:30 pm

    I’d say anything up to 10 years in difference is readable for me. Beyond that, probably not. I’ve done too many Diana Palmer books and a difference more than 10 years just isn’t readable to me. Although, the older I get, the more likely it is I’ll change my mind on that.

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  • reader che
    October 10
    2:48 am

    There are 2 May/Dec romances I’ve read: Anyone But You by Jennifer Crusie (fondly referred to as the dog book) and Leaving Normal by Stef Ann Holm. I don’t recall the age difference for ABY but in Leaving Normal, it was 9 years. I belive the heroine was 40, or very close to it. May/Dec romance is not one of my favorite plot elements, but I did enjoy both.

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