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I was going to post this over at Erecsite, when I saw Emily Veinglory’s survey, but why waste a perfectly good potential post on somebody else’s blog? *g*

I think here in Romanceland, we tend to label any blog posts that attract a lot of commenters as blog rows, or flames. I don’t necessarily agree with those labels. I think It’s fantastic to have blogs where people feel passionate enough to air their opinions, I really do.

Sometimes there’s no telling what’s gonna get people talking, for instance when I’m feeling that way inclined, (doesn’t happen very often) I’ll post what I think to be quite an indepth informational piece and get ten or twelve comments, and other days I can post one paragraph and get shitloads of people wanting to air their views. I think that’s kinda cool.

Also, I’m always pleasantly surprised by the response I get, when I do a football (soccer to you Americans) related post, for example the one I wrote when I was feeling lower than a snake’s belly due to England being dumped out of next year’s European Cup.

What I tend to find more and more these days, is that comments within a mostly innocuous post will as likely start a heated debate, as an inflammatory blog post. There’s always one person, who will say something that will piss a whole bunch of people off, and those people will then rush to air their own views, until you get to a point where everybody wants to have their tuppence worth.

I think that’s fab, and I’m pretty sure that a lot of people out there feel the same, otherwise why bother having blogs with open comments on them? Or even, why bother having blogs at all?

What tends to annoy is when people try to attribute motivations as to why I post about certain subjects. The thing is, nobody but me will ever really know, so speculation is often fruitless, and the verdict, mostly wrong.

When I read how fed up people are with blog dramas, I am often amused, because I then see those same people taking part in the so-called flame fests, or posting about how fed up they are with the blogs that constantly attract drama.

Another reason that I’m amused is because these so-called blog dramas tend to happen on fewer than four blogs, on any kind of consistent basis. (Admittedly in Romanceland, mine tends to be one of them, but I should think that by now that people know what to expect) This is a minute percentage, considering the actual number of Romancentric blogs out there. It really is.

I have over 100 blogs listed on my Google Reader, and I purposely tend not to include the ones that are likely to give me high blood pressure, so I just assume that other people do the same thing. Apparently not.

I guess what I’m saying is that there are probably thousands of book blogs out there that are nice, and balanced, and fair, and sweet and funny, and rarely use the ‘f’ word. These blogs are also relatively easy to find. So for those people who are fed up of the drama, there are plenty of other choices out there. Ya feel me?

By the way a big thanks to all of the people who took the time to comment on the Incest, Twincest, Daddy/daughter Play posts. I love that you guys feel free enough to air your thoughts on here, regardless of whether or not your opinions gel with mine, and long may it continue.

Without great debate, and difference of opinion, the world and Romanceland would be a much more boring place methinks.

And Jane, rock the fuck on, mate.


  • Anne
    November 29
    7:39 pm

    Well, just to prove this is one of the places I can be myself, I’ll say exactly how I feel. I fucking love your blog, Karen. You always post something interesting and sometimes what I don’t find interesting, others do, and vice versa. As you said, who knows what motivates? It will continue to be a mystery and I will continue, on a daily freaking basis and maybe more, to come back here and state my opinion when I feel the urge to do so, lurk other times, or just plain old give you a GREAT BIG SMOOCH for being such a cheeky beyotch. *G* HUGS!


  • sallahdog
    November 29
    8:46 pm

    I love me a good blog drama.. Honestly didn’t think this, or the dear author one this week, really qualified.

    I would call it a discussion.. Drama is when Someone blogs anonymously and then is found out making an ass out of themselves. They are outed, outrage ensues, Your all called mean girls and people make a HUGE deal about ignoring a certain blog on their blog because you are so Mean but yet seem to know if you so much as fart on your blog…

    THAT, Karen, is a blog drama, and we really haven’t had one of those in a LONG time and I am overdue… So get right on that for me, Ok?


  • Rowan Larke
    November 29
    9:05 pm

    I commented on Emily’s blog…because although it was interesting and spirited debate here…I was EXHAUSTED last night from arguing it all out with my CP. Of course, I write on the edge of some of the topics you covered yesterday, so the argument with her got a little…intense.

    I like your blog. I like that it makes me think. My own fault that I was thinking so hard my head now hurts…


  • kirsten saell
    November 29
    9:35 pm

    I enjoy debate as well. The only time I really have a problem is when namecalling and accusations start. This tends to happen whenever someone feels strongly about something, be it multiple POV fiction, twincest, or women who choose not to call themselves feminists. I have had other women practically frothing at the mouth telling me I shouldn’t be allowed to use birth control because I choose not to label myself as a feminist. And I have had people tell me I ought to be committed just because I won’t villify people for their private thoughts. But in any hot debate, there will always be those who favor meaningful discussion, and those who want to yell and hurl epithets. And we do kinda need those angry folks out there. If we didn’t have them, things wouldn’t get so darn interesting.

    I do like your blog, even if I don’t always agree with you. And though you can be…emphatic in expressing your opinion, I haven’t had occasion to take anything you have said personally. Some of the other commentors, though…


  • lisabea
    November 29
    9:38 pm

    Sometimes it’s interesting to watch from the sidelines, sometimes I think the topic is lame and I cannot for the life of me figure out why the fuck anyone cares about champagne flutes (but, hey, that’s just me), and sometimes I think it turns into plain ugliness and name calling. I don’t like that crap.


  • Eve Vaughn
    November 29
    11:43 pm

    I may not always reply to every topic but I definitely read the posts when I get a chance. Most people who make a big display of saying they’ll never read so and so’s blog again are the main ones lurking and will often post under different pseudonyms. Those who mean what they say usually don’t say it in public at all and simply make a concious decision not to visit anymore and don’t, so I’m always skeptical when I see said posts.

    Personally my favorite posts from your blog are the book reviews because I’m always looking for something good to read and the ones about what’s going on in your life (gives me a chance to catch up on my friend 😉 ) and the current events, but I do find the ‘controversial ones’ interesting too. It shows me a whole other persepective to issues I might feel differently about.

    As for twincest, while it’s not my cup of tea, all I can say is to each his/her own.


  • Emily Veinglory
    November 30
    12:50 am

    I agree, debate is what makes blogs interesting. If a blog, or even just a specific thread, is beginning to piss me off I just stop looking at it. If I get sick of a certain subject I stop taking part in that discussion.

    Some people seem to be missing their fuse box–they can’t walk away from something even when it it really twisting their tit :-/


  • Nora Roberts
    November 30
    12:53 am

    I enjoy the blog–I enjoy the discussions, whether or not I participate. And whether or not I agree with you, or some of the comments.

    But, GOD, the trolls are annoying.


  • Shiloh Walker
    November 30
    1:00 am

    Without great debate, and difference of opinion, the world and Romanceland would be a much more boring place methinks.

    Definitely. Although some writers… like… oh, say… me, for example 😉 would get more done if I wasn’t addicted to a couple of blogs.


  • Anonymous
    November 30
    1:31 am

    Ya’ll want blog drama?

    Start here:


    Now, naturally, certain people were rather curious. Google cache being a wonderful thing, it provided the following:

    1. The fanfic in question:


    2. An excerpt from JJ Massa’s The Edge, the alleged copy:


    I read this with my mouth hanging open. Which came first, I don’t know, but one is a copy of the other, I’d bet my panties on it.

    Excerpt One:

    New York, New York. So good they named it twice.

    ::Yeah, right::

    Tom hoisted his knap-sack higher over his aching shoulder and stared with ill-disguised disgust at the crumbling red-stone exterior of the precinct house until the impatient bustling of passers-by forced him to mount the steps and walk inside.


    The foyer was more chaotic than the street he’d left behind. The room was filled with screaming whores, sullen teens, a couple of blood-splattered drunks and someone curled up on the floor in one corner in a puddle of vomit. Tom wasn’t sure whether the huddled body was a homeless guy sleeping in the station or a corpse. At the desk a couple of burly uniforms had some crack-head pinned against the wall while a third cop performed a public strip-search.

    He slammed his knap-sack down on the desk and the noise startled a bored-looking cop to belch and frown in his direction.

    “What the fuck’s your problem? Join the queue.”

    Tom curled his mouth into a sneer of derision, cocking his head mockingly at the bedlam that purported to be a ‘queue’. “I’m not part of the entertainment. My name’s Tom Paris.”

    The cop returned his sneer, sliding his eyes up and down Tom’s body with obvious contempt. “You’re late. The Cap’n expected you two hours ago.”

    “My plane got delayed. I only arrived an hour ago and I had to drop off my luggage.”

    “Tell it to someone who cares, Paris.”

    Tom narrowed his eyes and folded his arms across his chest. “You got a problem?”

    “Me? Hell, no. I love having another city’s reject hoisted onto my precinct.”

    Excerpt Two:

    Philadelphia—the city of brotherly love. Yeah, I feel the love. Tyler winced and slung his backpack over his aching shoulder. Taking a deep breath, he forced himself off the teeming sidewalk and up the battered stairs of the old, red-bricked precinct house.

    The inside foyer was even more chaotic than the busy street he’d just left. The room he found himself in was peopled with glowering teens, screaming whores, a few stumbling drunks, and a plethora of independent chemists and their staff.

    Tyler dropped his backpack onto the desk letting the noise of its landing grab the attention of a surly looking officer who’d been flicking through a magazine.

    “You want something?” he growled, “Just get in line.”

    Tyler eyed him coldly, nodding his head at the motley mass of human chaos assembled. “I’m not here to sightsee. My name’s Tyler Baker.”

    The cop’s lip curled in an outright sneer of contempt. He looked Tyler up and down rudely. “You’re late. Lieu expected you a couple hours ago.”

    “My plane was delayed. I’ve only been in the city an hour,” he began to explain patiently.

    “Look deep into my eyes, Baker,” he said scornfully. “See any give-a-shit in there?”

    Tyler folded his arms across his chest. “You got a problem with me, officer?” he demanded icily.

    “Me? Hell, no,” the officer said innocently. “I love it when the West Coast’s castoffs show up on my doorstep.”


  • Teddy Pig
    November 30
    2:16 am

    Well now that is wrong! Poor Elisa!
    She is a very nice person who just reviews a ton of M/M Romance.

    She has nothing to do with J.J. Massa allegedly stealing someones fanfic.

    Why go there to cause a ruckus?

    Linden Bay took the book down anyway.


  • Katrina Strauss
    November 30
    3:30 am

    Some of my closest friendships have resulted from lively debates, and no, they weren’t always the ones I sided with. We need open debate, I mean, erm, discussion here in romance and epub land, so that we can all get a better grip on the industry from differing perspectives. I didn’t agree with half you today, but I agreed with the other half, and in both cases, I always enjoy having a chance to speak out about my work and why I pursue the passion of writing.


  • Leslie Kelly
    November 30
    3:37 am

    I am drawn to blog wars in the same way I always sort-of cover my eyes during the scary parts of movies but end up peeking through my fingers, anyway. It’s just too fascinating–in a gory way–not to watch.

    I am such a blog whore that my hubby has downloaded a program (at MY request) that shuts off my internet access from 9-5 every day because I am on such a tight deadline. (Yeah, I’m sure it really broke his heart.) If you looked around, you would probably notice my first comments showing up at around 17:00:01 on any given day.

    I also have to say I love your blog, Karen. Mainly because in reading your comments and viewing your faves, I think we’re a lot alike. And because I enjoy a completely bullshit-free zone.

    That said, I nearly shite myself when I saw that you’re reading one of my books.

    I do hope you like it, but almost wish you were reading my next one, instead, since it features my first African American couple, and I’m sweating bullets about it!


  • Misty G
    November 30
    4:13 am

    I’ve come to the conclusion that people who get really upset over opinions on other poeples blogs are most likely people who have spent way too much time online for the day, week, or month or whatever.

    Only reason I came up with that was because last time you had brought up Cruciger on this blog, I blog roamed so much to try to figure out what the heck was going on, that I really grew to not like the woman’s online persona, and I’d never even heard of her before.

    After I was done, and wrote about it a little on my own blog, I pretty much realized I’d wasted a lot of time on something that has zero effect on my every day life, but I wanted my slice of pie too I guess. Hey, I have to admit, I’m a fat girl who really loves her pie. I’ve grown to accept that in myself.

    I also told myself not to go looking for things that I know are going to tick me off. I’m usually 95% successful at that. There are just other posters/readers/authors who are only about 5% as successful.

    They spend too much time being angry about one or two or four sites that in the larger picture of it all do not contribute to the downfall of anyone in particular. If they do blame that website or person, then they aren’t looking in themselves hard enough when it comes to responsibility.


  • Jennifer McKenzie
    November 30
    4:22 am

    I love discussion. This blog and Dear Author are two of my favorites.
    Sometimes the comments get a little too personal and little heated, but I try and take all that with a grain of salt.
    Regardless of the nasty things I may mutter under my breath. LOL.
    The last topic that drew us all in was VERY interesting.


  • Shelby
    November 30
    5:53 am

    Karen, I love you–what is it again?–like a fat kid loves ice cream? Yeah. I think that’s it.

    I can’t believe my computer actually let me post this time. I always have trouble getting past some kind of weird pop-up security thing. Just know I visit every day without fail and take great delight in everything controversial and otherwise that you have to say.

    Ice cream. I’m tellin’ ya, baybee.


  • eggs
    November 30
    6:46 am

    I love the “offensive” postings, not because they’re offensive per se, but because their offensiveness comes from the communication of honest opinions by folks who aren’t afraid to say what they REALLY think.

    Often that poser cover really *does* suck the big one, the dress really *was* inappropriate for a business function and someone’s writing really was so bad that no amount of twincest or glittering champagne flutes in the world could make it interesting to a reader. All of these things are, of course, a matter of opinion and I very much enjoy having a place I can come to and hear those opinions be aired. Honesty doesn’t have to be twee and boring – it can be as unruly and interesting as hell!


  • Karen Scott
    November 30
    7:28 am

    Got a meeting in Scotland today, and I really should have left already, but I had to stop and say ((((SHELBY!!))), Where the hell have you been!!

    And eggs, it gave me a little thrill when you used the word ‘twee’. I always thought that that was such an English word. Or Are you a Brit anyway?

    I do hope you like it, but almost wish you were reading my next one, instead, since it features my first African American couple, and I’m sweating bullets about it!

    Ooh, I’m gonna look when I get back!!


  • Desiree Erotique
    November 30
    8:02 am

    I enjoy reading/participating in a good discussion, though rabid, volcanic arguments get boring quick. Usually, no matter how “controversial” the discussions get here at your blog, Karen, they don’t descend to that level.

    Anyway, I think the reason I keep coming to read your posts is your way of expressing yourself. You sometimes get overwrought about certain subjects, and once in awhile I think you can be a tad quick to judge, and many times you’ve simply cracked me up with your very personalized terms for things (I’d just told my husband earlier today about that recent one, “Assaholic” LOL) I can’t pretend to know why you feel the way you do about things, but you’re always articulate and generally humorous and I like that in a person.


  • Dawn
    November 30
    9:00 am

    Just have to say, Anne – I love your little picture!

    Karen your’s is the only blog that I look at everyday and like some said, I don’t comment on every subject, but I am extremely entertained by your topics, sometimes I very nearly wet myself laughing. You’re a funny woman and in a great way.

    BTW do you watch Strictly Come Dancing or are you an X-Factor fan? We ditched X-Factor right after the auditions (those are the best bits after all) and have been ODing on Strictly. I would like Alesha Dixon to win – she just seems to have this sheer joy about every dance she does. Kelly Brook (bitch) I cannot stand. She is just so false and up her own ass. AND we’re going to see the Strictly Live on Tour in Birmingham in Feb. Jade & I are mucho excited!


  • M
    November 30
    2:21 pm

    Um, someone was complaining about the last few threads? Oddly, those threads are LAME. Compared to true flame throwing the recent discussions were the equivalent of a tea party. But that is just me I guess (I was a hard core bbs frequenter for several years, starting in 1997).

    I am relatively new here. Been around less than a year. Lurk more than participate. Can’t say I am friends with anyone here, not enough interaction with anyone… and frankly, I prefer things to be that way.

    I don’t come here for the reviews either. My taste does not match Karen’s at all, so I pretty much skip them. The same happens with the reviews in the only other two blogs I visit (Dear Author and Smart Bitches). Additionally, I sometimes find the reviews a bit harsh, but I don’t go about criticizing review styles. It is a reviewer’s prerogative how to express their their opinion, and as a visitor it is my prerogative to read them or not. I would say that is a fair deal.

    I enjoy the blogs and get both useful and useless information –hey, we all need information that we know we don’t need but is oh so amusing to get 😉 as well as insight on subjects that interest me that probably I wouldn’t get anywhere else.

    I do find interesting the general discussions on romance, the industry, publishers, etc. Sometimes the sarcastic/humorous postings are really amusing. That is what brings me to Karen’s and the other two blogs I mentioned.

    I don’t involve myself in flame wars of any sort. My days of carrying around a flame thrower were left behind way back in 1999 hehe Now, when I see things get too heated, I just walk away, and come back after a few days, when the dust begins to settle.

    I never understood those that go bitch and moan and cry foul and declare they are leaving for good … only to have them return a couple of weeks later… though it is rather amusing to watch them go around and around and around in an endless circle (my friends and I way back when would place bets on how long would it take the current drama queen to come back after leaving in a huff).

    Anyway, I am in my usual rambling mode, but just wanted to say that I do have fun visiting this blog, reading the discussions/arguments, participating every once in a while, and watching the ocassional drama.


  • Shirley
    November 30
    9:00 pm

    ROFLMAO, let it go Ms. Roberts. In 68 years, do you think you’re the first person to call me a troll? I worked in medicine, for heaven’s sake.

    I read lots of blogs for lots of different reasons, Karen. Yours are usually good for a laugh and a grin, which is something I don’t take for granted any day. Sometimes you stay stuff that makes you look like an asshat – I laughed my ass off the first time I saw you use it, at least I think it was you- IMO, but hell, everyone looks like an asshat sometime or another.

    As for drama, well it’s popular. Why the hell have daytime soaps been on for so long, LOL!

    I say a little debate is good for the soul, but when it gets really ugly, well, I just go to a different blog 🙂

    I see Karen agrees with you. Guess I’ll have to ‘sign in’, LOL!


  • Ciar Cullen
    December 1
    9:29 pm

    Hmnn, late again to the party. You sometimes piss me off, but that’s because you have a strong personality and strong opinions. Since we don’t have to share a flat, it doesn’t much matter. I’m a boring blogger, because I haven’t developed a thick enough skin. That’s on the agenda for 2008. Keep up the good work. Honesty is never, ever a bad thing. Unless it’s aimed at me. ;o)


  • Katie(babs)
    December 1
    9:50 pm

    It’s some scary stuff over at Dear Author. I admit I lurk but don’t post over there because they will eat me alive.
    Poor Adele 🙁 I do like her books even though she may not be accurate. Damn her for writing about champagne flutes!!
    But I do love the cute cat pictures Jane puts up.


  • eggs
    December 1
    10:47 pm

    Ciar Cullen said…
    “You sometimes piss me off, but that’s because you have a strong personality and strong opinions. Since we don’t have to share a flat, it doesn’t much matter.”

    This totally cracked me up! I have to say I couldn’t agree more with the sentiment. Maybe those who get all huffy and personally offended at things said on the blogs should be forced to live with a house full of alcoholic pseudo marxist vegans for six months. If *that* doesn’t re-calibrate your offense-o-meter, nothing will!

    And no, Karen, I am not a Brit. Well, technically I am one, but I’ve never lived there so it doesn’t count. My Dad was one though and I’m sure that’s the linguistic influence you hear.


  • Emily Veinglory
    December 2
    7:15 pm

    I was in a diverse run-down 11-person flat once, where my room was the size of a telephone box. After that the blogverse is easy….


  • eggs
    December 2
    10:13 pm

    Now I’ve got the urge to track down a Young Ones dvd set for christmas …


  • Anonymous
    December 3
    4:32 pm

    From Leslie Kelly: I do hope you like it, but almost wish you were reading my next one, instead, since it features my first African American couple, and I’m sweating bullets about it!

    Is that with Harlequin’s segregated AA lines or the other ones (with better distribution and money)?


  • Danielle
    December 3
    5:57 pm

    This is a great site. I lurk sometimes, but you always have something interesting to say. It’s a breath of fresh air.


  • Leslie Kelly
    December 4
    3:13 pm

    >Is that with Harlequin’s segregated AA lines or the other ones (with better distribution and money)?< I suspect I’ve already answered this, “anonymous” if you’re the same person who emailed me yesterday with a similarly toned question. For anyone else out there who’s curious, it’s a Blaze with 5 novellas about 5 different bridesmaids. The African American couple are featured in one of the novellas, and I wrote it because the AA heroine was established as one of the best friends of the heroine in my September book (the one getting married in this book.) So she would, of course, be a bridesmaid. To me, it was absolutely a no-brainer that I could do it, and should do it, and my editor agreed. I honestly was stunned by your email. Had perhaps expected some reaction from my readers…but not the anger and bitterness from AA romance writers, which you told me, a complete stranger to you, that I would probably be facing. And yes, I am pissed-off that you brought this *here* when you said you were a direct person and that’s why you were writing me such a very… direct…email. Which I very pleasantly and promptly answered.


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