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I Think I Just Threw Up In My Mouth…

Wednesday, April 2, 2008
Posted in: Uncategorized

I can’t tell you how much this cover disturbs me. I’ve put it under the cut, because I think it may put some of you off your breakfast. You have been warned.

I guess this makes me ageist, but that cover is wrong on so many levels.

The books is from Carnal Desires Publishing. No, I’ve never heard of them either.

Oh God, check out the blurb, from the website:

Mary Grace, a widow now seventy, turned on to sex following her menopause. A naïve, guilt-ridden virgin at the time of her marriage, she never learned to relax and enjoy sex. Her husband proved a poor lover who only touched her when he wanted to get laid. Once he could no longer become erect, he ceased initiating sexual exchanges. At the time he died, Mary Grace’s libido took off. Eventually, she permitted herself to masturbate.

She soon discovered her ability to achieve orgasm. When Mary Grace hears Nick Jacobson read poetry at the Senior Citizens Center, she decides to get to know him better. Via the Internet, she learns of his book-signing at a local bookstore, and plans to attend. Eagerly, she fantasizes about sexual encounters with this retired teacher, but she first must buy a whole new wardrobe of sexy underwear.

The two meet. Coyly, Mary Grace lets Nick know of her interest in learning more about sex. Well able to succeed at that task, he takes it on. An aging male well versed in the art of offering delicious sensual caresses, he finds handling the teaching a bit easier than he does achieving hardness. Still, he’s a sensual man who loves eating a woman, and this is just what Mary Grace needs. She always felt that no man could admire her genitals, but Nick quickly convinces her that he loves the aroma and taste of her pussy.

Mary Grace becomes comfortable with her body and Nick’s. She learns to enjoy both giving and receiving oral sex, and she even finds pleasure and excitement in talking dirty. Nick teaches her new positions. When he also introduces her to his gay son and his partner, she finds them a delightful couple.

The budding romance becomes temporarily inconvenienced by an unfinished relationship that Nick needs to end. A more serious complication gets introduced by a woman who stalks and harasses not only Nick, but also Mary Grace and her family. At length, it seems as if everyone is screwing everyone else, except the two main characters. Mary Grace and Nick perfect a hot monogamous romance: one that offers lifelong pleasure.

Wow…

Via the C’um Hither blog.

46 Comments »

  • Um, thanks, but NO THANKS. I don’t have any desire whatsoever to go there. Rates up there with knowing your parents have sex. I mean, you KNOW it happened, how else would you be here, but you sure as hell don’t want to hear about it (or in this case read about it)…EVER.

    And don’t get me started on the blurb…gave me the creeps just reading it.

    ReplyReply

  • What a lovely picture to wake up to on this beautiful morning.
    Bleck.
    I am with Heather.

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  • sallahdog
    April 2
    2:06 pm

    I am quickly coming to the age where that cover would look like me and the hubby… I wouldnt mind the story, but I don’t even want to picture myself that way,,, soft focus people… soft focus…

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  • MissKitty
    April 2
    2:16 pm

    Happy belated april fools day ^^
    Though… Charlton Heston in his 70´s…

    nah, not really

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  • Puppet Truth
    April 2
    2:36 pm

    You know my step father had a thing for those Over 40 porno mags… this looks right up his ally…
    For the rest of the non perverted members of society, I think this is a step in the wrong direction (just like that twincest thing) and can only be another in the “disaster wall” thats building thats going to give e publishing a worse name then it has.
    Why oh why do people think this is sexy? Cuz you know someone did…

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  • What is the point of reading the book? The blurb gives the entire story line away.

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  • Uh…

    No.

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  • The cut doesn’t work in Google Reader 🙁

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  • And thus the ageist movement gains momentum. Ho-lee Crap!

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  • They’re just swapping dentures.

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  • Jenns
    April 2
    4:27 pm

    Eeks.
    *Shudder*

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  • Grrrly
    April 2
    4:34 pm

    gah, i hate you so much right now karen. this is what we call “bad sharing”. >.<

    ReplyReply

  • As members of the former “Love Generation” hit retirement age and pop Viagra like candy…get used to this sort of thing. *makes like a perv and goes back to writing characters at that magic age of romance land — nineteen*

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  • emdee
    April 2
    4:35 pm

    OK, I’ll be 59 in August and I gotta tell you, I am not in the least grossed out. What’s wrong with elderly people having sex? Jeez. One of my dearest friends who is 66 and has a 47 year old son just fell in love for the first time in her life. She was married for 25 years to a man who was abusive and controlling. She and her significant other, who is 65, just moved in together. I am so happy for her because she has found something wonderful at this stage in her life. C’mon people, what’s wrong with a little happiness? After all, wasn’t the Barbara Walters special last night about living to 150? Should sex only be confined to 30 or 40 years of that life span? What happens during the rest of your life? Heck, good regular sex keeps you youthful. We should all be so lucky to have sex as senior citizens. Oh, and not everyone over 50 has dentures…

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  • Dorothy Mantooth
    April 2
    4:38 pm

    I don’t think the cover is so awful, but the blurb is awful.

    And how is she learning the pleasures of giving oral sex when he can’t get it up? *shudder*

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  • Puppet, are you suggesting that having sex after 50 or 60 or whatever is perverted?

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  • Puppet Truth
    April 2
    5:01 pm

    Not in the least… Hell Im all for it… I just dont wanna see it, or think about it. Thats like admitting to yourself that your grandparents are getting it on, and while (sadly) I know mine are still (finding the viagra isnt something any grand child should do, nor is hearing at dinner that its not working on a holiday)I dont wanna know about it.
    I merely state that while the whole sex after 50 is cool, dont bring it out to me in the forefront. Its one of those taboos, like the Barely Legal magazines, the Over 40 ones are for the “elite” few who get off on that. Thats what I meant by perverse. And I meant no offense to you or anyone by stating my opinion. I dont wanna see Kids glorified in sexual acts, and i dont wanna see people i could consider my grandparents doing it as well. Its just not sexy on the whole…
    But thats just me.

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  • Argh. This is like imagining my mom having a sex-life and I know she never did. *smirk*

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  • Barbara Sheridan
    April 2
    5:25 pm

    Hey you whipper snappers–old babes need love too!

    The “blurb” is more of a synopsis and a dull one at that.

    The cover is meh.

    I’ve seen worse but this one would be so much better if the woman’s hair didn’t look so tacked on and that odd hand was not on her back. That arm does not belong to the old guy she’s making out with.

    Click the pic and take a close look at the larger version. I swear that arm has a faded suit jacket attached. Who does it belong to?

    I’d like to see Anne Cain tackle an older couple cover.

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  • Thank you, Puppet. Didn’t think so, but wanted to know.

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  • emdee
    April 2
    6:29 pm

    Sex over 50 is taboo??? Compared it to kid sex??? Wha???

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  • Jenns
    April 2
    6:38 pm

    I’m not against sex and romance amongst the older set. Not in the least.
    I just think the cover and blurb could be much more tasteful.

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  • All right. The house hunk and I celebrated 40 years list last December. We’re um, doing just fine…just fine. However, that cover is not attractive. The story line implies that she had to wait until she was a senior citizen before she learned about sex. Ugh.

    My grandparents were still quite sexually active into their seventies and that was before the little blue pill.

    Storylines with older couples don’t bother me at all, but that particular story doesn’t do much for me. Maybe a menage…

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  • Claudia
    April 2
    7:53 pm

    I often seek books with older heroines because I loathe a lot of the 16-20 something heroines out there.

    Night Garden has been my favorite older couple romance for ages. A woman finds love while recovering from a stroke and then deals with the fallout between her son and her new beau.

    In general, women are living longer then men and may find themselves competing for male attention in their senior years. Hence the phenom of increasing std & sti rates among such ladies because birth control isn’t a worry and some old folks with herpes, hiv, and other conditions can be as dupilicitious about their conditions as young ones.

    I might actually read this book just for kicks. But I’m also a person that gifted my mom with plush microbes to use as props in her sex ed workshops…

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  • emdee, that was kind of the point of my tongue-in-cheek comment. Yesterday we were debating underage sex in romance; today’s hot button is perhaps being a little too mature? Though I still like that magic age of nineteen, what can I say, but I guess 90 year olds gotta have their fun too? 😉

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  • Some people seem squicked over books about the sex life of older women, like their mothers.
    I don’t care to read about the sex life of girls, like my daughters.
    However, this book sounds dull and rather dreary from the synopsis, and the cover is certainly not the best.

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  • emdee
    April 2
    8:20 pm

    I apologize Katrina. And I agree, the cover is odd. But I guess it goes straight for the targeted demographic.

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  • MB (Leah)
    April 2
    8:35 pm

    Having worked in nursing homes and with the elderly a lot, I can attest to the fact that the sex drive is still there for some if not many well into the 70’s and 80’s. Masturbating regularly is quite common as well, women as equally as men. So, this isn’t that weird.

    I don’t know if my grandparents were still having sex, but they were the cutest couple, constantly hugging and kissing and touching each other right up until the end, and I would have to say “grandma, get a room.” I really loved to see them enjoying each other so much after all those years together.

    I can see where this type of book would have some appeal to those in that generation. However, if I read a book with lots of sex, I don’t want to imagine 70 year olds. Doesn’t work for me even though I’ll be the big 50 this year.

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  • Lleeo
    April 2
    10:00 pm

    that cover is not attractive. The story line implies that she had to wait until she was a senior citizen before she learned about sex. Ugh.

    I have to agree with this. It seems like ageism is still pretty prevalent in society but I bet we’ll see more and more stuff like this in the future as the Baby Boomers get older and start demanding to see more positive and realistic images of “old people.” I’m 21 and would like to use the excuse that I like reading about characters who are more around my age but really, that doesn’t hold much sway considering I’ve been reading about 30-something and 40-something couples in romance novels for years (I’ve never been a big historical romance reader, so it started with romantic-suspense with me, where most couples are older). So I just have to admit that the thought of reading about two 70-year-olds, especially ones who look like that (where’s the Ed Harris or Tommy Lee Jones look-a-like?) kind of squicks me out. But hey, one of my favourite romantic heroes of all time, the guy in Suzanne Brockmann’s The Admiral’s Bride was 52 and I barely noticed after I got into the story.

    So hey, if it’s a good story, interesting characters, great author, I’m pretty open to trying a lot of different things as long as they don’t cross my moral boundaries. 😀 And besides, my mom recently told me the story of how my great uncle, who never married and as an old man would walk the back country roads by his farm holding hands with his best (male) friend. His sister always thought it was so sweet that he was so close and comfortable with his friend. This was in the 70s, so my only my grandma and aunt and uncles (in their teens and 20s) realized the relationship for what it was. But I thought it was such a sweet kind of sad love story. So heh, I’m kind of interested to see where this trend goes. ^_^

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  • I want to have something interesting to say…but I’m laughing too hard to be coherent.

    Dee

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  • I don’t have a problem with it. In fact I am on my way to buy it.

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  • Well, my problem is the blurb. It’s not fitting with the “age” thing. Honestly, I think if she’s a “guilt ridden virgin” then she’d probably have a little less openness.
    However, the subject matter could be done, I think. Even be erotic.
    After all, there was a time when “over forty” romances were completely ignored. Now, there’s a bunch of them.
    I’m just saying it doesn’t have to be raunchy. Most 70 year olds aren’t raunchy in my opinion.
    I could be wrong though.
    Maybe Emily will do a review and let us know.

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  • I don’t have a problem with the cover, although I’ve never been a fan of that type of painting. And I read the excerpt. It’s not the worst I’ve read. Everybody’s entitled to a fulfilling sex life, so why should age be a problem?

    Also, I thought the author handled the worries of an older woman who doesn’t have much sexual experience reasonably well. The train of thought Mary Grace had certainly sounded plausible to me. If it encourages older people (especially women) to rethink their assumptions and past experiences (it seems the author is a retired sex therapist) and decide to go for a great sex life, why not?

    And so what if it makes you think of your parents having sex? They’re people too, aren’t they, and entitled to some pleasure? As long as they’re not having sex with YOU, why should it have a squicky factor at all? Accept reality and move on.

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  • It’s not a book I’d want to read – and I don’t think the cover is all that great – but other than that I don’t think there’s anything wrong with it. I think it encouraging almost that a woman in her 70’s is still enjoying sex.

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  • I don’t think the cover is any worse than some Harl Presents covers–albeit with less clothing, but considering the sexual content/theme, the image makes sense. While I’m not squicked out by the pic or the thought of senior cits making love, the writing in the blurb and excerpt needs a bit more polish, imo.

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  • Old people need lovin’ too. 😀 Besides, I’ve seen worse.

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  • linda
    April 3
    10:20 am

    I thought it was two old men before I read the blurb. While I will admit older people enjoy sex (and I hope I do when I am 70), when I read fiction I would rather fantasise about non-wrinklies.

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  • Rosemary Laurey
    April 3
    2:55 pm

    What’s getting to some of you? The cover? Granted, it’s not the finest cover art in the world, but it’s a story about a couple of Septagenarians. The odds are they will be gray haired and a bit wrinkled. It happens.

    The body might sag over the decades but interest in sex doesn’t.

    And if the idea of people that age having sex strikes you as odd/disgusting/ implausible… all I can say is just you wait, you’ll be there before you know what happened.

    I think this may well be the start of a new trend.

    There’s more of us wrinklies out there every year, and we’re outnumbering the buff twenty and thirty somethings.

    Heck, there’s a bunch of wrinklies WRITING the naughty books.

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  • hvitveis
    April 3
    7:22 pm

    two adults making out? Nothing sick about that.

    ReplyReply

  • One thing I learned at the EPPIES: most people writing erotic romance seem to be grannies 🙂

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  • Keishon
    April 4
    12:34 am

    You all are so bad with the gags and the “don’t want to go there” type of comments. Reminds of Dave Chappelle, season 2, where he proposed sex education to high school students, who gagged and ran out of the auditorium when they were forced to watch two seniors rubbing all on each other. There is nothing wrong with two elderly people getting it on. I don’t need to read it (nor watch it or imagine it) but there’s nothing wrong with it.

    You will be there one day, if you are lucky (and blessed). Peace.

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  • Wow.

    That’s not something I’d want to read or see or hear about but I don’t care that it happens…get your groove on Grams and Paps! ;P Just don’t tell me about it. =)

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  • Wendy
    April 5
    12:34 am

    MY EYES! Holy crap, that’s just too disturbing!

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  • Rosemary Laurey
    April 5
    3:14 am

    One thing I learned at the EPPIES: most people writing erotic romance seem to be grannies 🙂

    You are so right weinglory!

    After all everyone think about it. Who’s had more sex- a twenty-thirty something or a fifty-sixty something?

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  • I don’t think the cover is any worse than some Harl Presents covers–albeit with less clothing, but considering the sexual content/theme, the image makes sense. While I’m not squicked out by the pic or the thought of senior cits making love, the writing in the blurb and excerpt needs a bit more polish, imo.

    Yeah, at first I didn’t really like the cover, especially his receding white hairline but it is tastefully done and I usually don’t pay attention to the characters on most covers and like to use my own imagination along with the author’s description anyway. ^_~ I also agree that the blurb sounded a little awkward in some places, especially when it talked about him liking her “genitals” and her “pussy”‘s “aroma.” Those are definitely not phrases that get me going.

    I guess it still kind of puts me off because I’m still stuck in the mindset of, “But those are old wrinkly people! They’re not sexually attractive!” I’m sure I’d get over it if it was a good story and romance, though. ^_~ And as for thinking about my parents having sex, I can’t equate that with reading about characters who are their age because I read about characters that age all the time and they’re completely different people. All they have in common with my parents is age. 😉

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  • This particular cover and blurb aside (and, I agree, neither is very appealing), the notion of elder sex doesn’t bother me nearly as much as picturing those hairless, bony, fish-belly-colored emo-type dudes trying to get it on…with anything. That verges on kiddie porn, far as I’m concerned. Yuckola!

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