Ahhh Madris DePasture, she really is the gift that just keeps on giving.

Several people sent this rant to me yesterday, so I thought I’d post the salient bits on here. The e-mail was from Madris, to her beloved authors. Vidi:

For those of you who’ve been with us here at NCP for a while, you’ve very likely heard this speech before, but we have a lot of new authors now who haven’t, so please bear with me. I’ve recently had another nasty run-in with an author and felt like I should post something to explain since you’ve no doubt heard by now what a hateful, nasty bitch I am.

Damn, people are calling her a nasty bitch now? How verry dare they?

I’ve been accused of being blunt. I am. I don’t deny it. I’m southern born and bred, but I’ve got a good bit of the Scot in me—so, yes, I can be excruciatingly blunt. I am, have always been, and always will be as courteous, respectful, professional, and polite as I possibly can be, however, as long as I’m approached in that manner. I can, and will, be as mean, nasty, hateful, and rude as yoU can be, maybe a good deal more than you can, if you verbally attack me and insult me.

That’s the bottom line. Treat me as you would like to be treated. I expect it. I require it and as long as authors approach me with any question or doubt and treat me with the respect I deserve, I’ll respond as politely as I can. I don’t need, want, or expect brown nosing. I will not brown nose. I will apologize ONLY when I am wrong.

If I was a newbie author and I received an e-mail like this, I’d have to at least wonder what I’d let myself in for, but I guess the Desperate-To-Be-Published don’t give a crap as long as somebody’s willing to publish their work.

We’re always happy to get new authors and hope that they’ll be successful and sell many books. Authors should understand coming into this business, however, that we, as publishers, have no more control over how well you do, or how badly you do, than any other publisher. We try to take what you’ve produced and present it to our customers as appealingly as possible, but, in the end, the customers decide what they like, what they don’t like, and what they have no interest in.

Wow. Let us all marvel at her motivational and inspirational way of addressing her new authors for a minute…

Regardless, we have one of the largest customer bases in the business and it is HIGHLY unlikely that your book will sell better than it does at NCP. For those of you busy burning your bridges, keep in that mind and you should also keep in mind that I make it a policy never to do business with anyone I know will stab me in the back.

Your contract clearly states that you will support NCP and promote the company. Every single author who has gone on record trashing this company on the internet is in breach and has made my list.

And the sad thing is, her words will probably frighten some of her authors into keeping quiet about her ill-treatment of them.

I do realize that a lot of people are feeling the stress of the economic crises. Biting the hand that might feed you isn’t the smartest move you could make, however, and, as I told my last husband before I booted him to the curb—Don’t take out your frustrations on me. I won’t stand for it. I will try to help if there’s any way I can, but I’m not going to be your doormat or your punching bag. I don’t turn the other cheek.

As always, this material is © copyrighted by Madris DePasture and any reproduction in whole or in part is a copyright violation that will be reported. (KS: Oh goody!)

I bet her authors felt all lovely and warm inside after reading this latest rant.

Batshit isn’t the word. She might even be in the same league as The Vicious Rhinoceros and her side-kick.