What We Did Last Night AKA Car Crash Wedding…
Sunday, January 10, 2010Posted in: some people have no idea, there's nowt queer as folk, They do say you can't buy taste
Katie Price
Have any of you ever attended a wedding full of lapdancers and strippers?
Well, TTG and I did last night.
The bride was a lapdancer, and she invited a whole host of her lapdancing friends and colleagues.
It was certainly an eye-opener.
It was so clichéd.
We were invited by the groom, who was TTG’s friend, and neither of us had met the bride before, so this entitled us to be as mean and two-faced as we liked. So we indulged.
I’ve actually never seen so many botoxed cheeks, enhanced lips, fake double D boobs, and orange peel-looking skin in one place. The bride, bless her cottons looked like her lips were hurting, and her black Katie Price styled hair extensions kept getting caught in the train of her dress.
TTG and I spent most of the day with our jaws on the floor, and we were mean and totally judgemental, and after attempting to converse with a few of the lapdancers, that didn’t change.
Anyway, we had a good time, even though I was the designated driver as per usual.
At the end of the night, we came home and cackled like the bad people we are, hehe…
lisa
January 10
5:18 pm
I have been to a stripper funeral, if that counts. The DRAMA. The tears. The spike heels sinking into the ground graveside.
Ann Bruce
January 10
8:05 pm
No stripper wedding, but I did attend a drag wedding. I had never felt so inadequate as a female in my life, but after a few drinks, I had a blast. That night, I learned my token gay friend is right: he’s nowhere near bitchy enough to do the drag scene.
Shiloh Walker
January 10
11:17 pm
O_O
This sounds like book material.
Details. Us writers need more details.
sula
January 11
12:33 am
Sounds like reality TV. And not in a good way. Did you take pics?
SarahT
January 11
10:35 am
That’s hysterical! I hope you took lots of photos.
KristieJ
January 11
11:18 am
So – Is this a marriage you think will last?
Mary Beth
January 11
2:12 pm
It sounds like a new version of “Tony and Tina’s Wedding.”
Maddie
January 11
3:53 pm
@KristieJ: So – Is this a marriage you think will last?
I would have to say NOPE !! Three years at the max.
Chantal
January 11
4:46 pm
Why Maddie? Because strippers can’t be good wives? I was one for a few year, I better tell my husband who I have been married to for 15 years that we wont last.
Karen Scott
January 11
8:42 pm
@ KristieJ
Those two have as much chance of lasting as Britney Spears and Kfed did, and it has little to do with her being a stripper. The drugs will kill them off if nothing else does.
Oh didn’t I mention, she’d allegedly been doing coke later on in the evening. Mind you, come to think of it, the groom looked quite bright-eyed and bushy-tailed too.
Anon
January 11
8:59 pm
Went to a church wedding recently where the groom and his groomsmen wore suits but no ties (for a beach wedding, maybe, but a church wedding? Not a good look.) The groom AND the preacher both chewed gum throughout the ceremony. The preacher, when he wasn’t messing up his lines and starting over again, spent a good thirty minutes lecturing on what makes a good Christian marriage–primarily, it seems, a wife’s obedience to her husband, which made more than one or two women in the audience roll their eyes and snicker (including me). The ceremony concluded with the bride’s mother singing, “Love, soft as an easy chair…” loudly and…not pleasingly.
As entertaining as that wedding was, yours sounds even more so.
I met a couple just a few days ago who had marriage counseling while they were still dating. Maybe more people should be doing that.
Maddie
January 12
9:34 pm
I guess so Chantal because that environment is really not conducive to a happy marriage, sorry but not a good way to make money.
Kels
January 13
12:45 am
Nice to know these people went to the effort and expense to have you at their wedding so you can make fun of them. You truly are a good friend.
Karen Scott
January 13
9:14 pm
Doesn’t that stick up your arse hurt? I’d remove it if I was you.
Just sayin’.
Miscinnamon
January 15
8:17 am
Nice to know these people went to the effort and expense to have you at their wedding so you can make fun of them. You truly are a good friend.
Snarky comments, making fun of the guests, and generally gossiping is one of the main activities one does enjoy in a wedding (next to dancing, drinking, eating, driking, ogling, drinking). Pretending that you don’t, and being judgemental just make you look hypocritical. You deserved the stick comment…really, you begged for it LOL
Anyway, my worse:funnier wedding story involves my evangelical cousin, her horny and sleazy preacher advising throughout the ceremony her to accept being dominated by her husband, especially in bed (sic); and the whole assembly loudly blessing her belly (not her, her belly)and praying for it to get full of baby as soon as possible. I almost thought they would drag a bed in the middle of the room to make the happy couple “consumate and be fruitful”…
Miscinnamon
January 15
8:20 am
Snarky comments, making fun of the guests, and generally gossiping is one of the main activities one does enjoy in a wedding (next to dancing, drinking, eating, driking, ogling, drinking). Pretending that you don’t, and being judgemental just make you look hypocritical. You deserved the stick comment…really, you begged for it LOL
Anyway, my worse/funnier wedding story involves my evangelical cousin, her horny and sleazy preacher advising throughout the ceremony her to accept being dominated by her husband, especially in bed (sic); and the whole assembly loudly blessing her belly (not her, her belly)and praying for it to get full of baby as soon as possible. I almost thought they would drag a bed in the middle of the room to make the happy couple “consumate and be fruitful”…