Prince Albert: “I wonder how Nicole’s doing…” Charlene: “Fuck me, he kisses like Daddy’s Koi carp.”

The man has two illegitimate children, and apparently only married Charlene because he needed a proper heir, not one born out of wedlock. To make things worse, there are rumours that he has two more illegitimate children. A five year old, and one not born yet. The man obviously doesn’t believe in sexing safely. He really should be gloving before the loving methinks. He really should be keeping his semen confined to the sterile environment of a condom, if only just for the women he’s shagging.

Charlene, (bless her cotton socks) is also rumoured to have tried to escape the wedding three times, but kept getting caught by the security guards.

On second thoughts, this so could be a Harlequin Presents Royal Wedding story. The problem is, the bride appears to have married the villain rather than the hero.

Well, hopefully when she’s counting his money and dripping in the crown jewels, she wont be too sad that Albert’s out humping the next blow up doll.

Mind you, I have to say, much respect to Albert for shagging and impregnating a black woman from Togo. His family must have hit the roof, hahaha! Can you imagine Prince Harry coming home to Granny with a black girl on his arm? I’m pretty sure her Majesty The Queen would probably keel over. Oh I’d so love for that to happen. It really would make my life I think, hahahaha!