Warning, shitloads of spoilers and swearing ahead

I’ve been on a bit of of a romance reading slump lately, so the other day, I decided to buy some non-romance fiction.

Fuck me, what a mistake that was.

The first book was called The Second Husband, by a Brit author called Louise Candlish.

I bought it, because I’d read one of her older books a while ago, and had enjoyed it, so I thought I’d give this one a try.

Jesus, I shouldn’t have fucking bothered.

Basically, the story is about a divorced woman (Kate), with two kids, boy, eleven, and girl, seventeen, who is forced to take in a lodger after her ex-husband announces that his current wife is pregnant. (Less maintenance money, etc.)

Anyway, the daughter (Roxy) was basically a slut, who could have done with a firm hand or two. She also has an equally slutty friend, who had a habit of talking to her own mother like crap. She also needed a good kick up the arse.

The mother (Kate) becomes attracted to the apparently charismatic lodger, (Davis) although, she can tell that he has no interest in her as a woman.

One day, whilst Kate is trying to relive her youth by trying on her daughter’s slutty clothes, Davis knocks on the door. When Davis sees Kate in Roxy’s clothes, he gets turned on, and he’s so overcome with lust that he jumps on Kate, and they have jack-rabbit sex.

At this point, I am totally skeeved out, because quite obviously, the man has a thing for younger girls.

Anyway, things cool down a bit between them, and Kate starts noticing how much time Davis is spending ‘tutoring’ Roxy (Did I mention that the man is a teacher by the way?).

Kate, whilst feeling insecure about Davis’ affections for her, tells him that he has to find somewhere else to stay. At this point, Davis asks her to marry him (bear in mind that they’ve only been sorta seeing each other for two weeks).

Kate who is a fucktard above all fucktards, agrees to marry a man who only seems to find her attractive when she’s wearing teen clothes. A man she’s only known for two fucking weeks.

Davis and Kate then get married, quite quickly. Kate can’t believe that she’s managed to bag this seemingly perfect man, and is happy as a pig in shit. For about two minutes, at least.

One day, whilst she’s clearing out Davis’ old room, she finds some love letters. Kate, being a total fuckwit, and a disgrace to woman-kind in general, initially assumes that the letters are an homage to her.

As she reads on, she discovers that the letters are actually about her daughter Roxy (Give the fucking woman a medal). It turns out that Roxy and Davis had been secretly having an affair, and that Davis only asked Kate to marry him, so that he could stay close to Roxy. Stellar.

Mayhem and madness ensues, and the daughter ends up running away with Kate’s second husband.

Fuck me, rigid. I really hated this book.

What pissed me off the most about The Second Husband  was that there wasn’t a satisfactory come-uppance for Davis. Or Roxy, come to think of it. They’d basically messed up loads of lives, caused lots of heartache, and the author didn’t see fit to make them pay. That made me mad as hell. So mad in fact that I threw the fucking book out of the window. I think it will be a happy addition to the compost at the bottom of the garden.

Anyway, being a glutton for punishment, I read the next book on my list, Meg Hutchinson’s The Wanton Redhead. I’m too annoyed to even discuss that book right now, so I’ll wait until I’ve calmed down sufficiently enough to talk about it.